How to Annoy People

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Shelle Baker
November 15, 2001
English 111 (13)

How To Annoy People

This paper will attempt to explore how to annoy people in many different situations these categories are as followas : how to annoy people in restaurants, chat rooms, while driving, and in the grocery store. Also explored are annoying your roommate, your neighbors, public bathroom stall mates, your teacher or professor, and the police. The following are guaranteed ways to annoy at your favorite restaurant: Decline to be seated and simply eat their complementary mints by the cash register. Pretend you do not understand what your server is saying no matter how much he/she yells or how slowly they say it. Ask your server for an extra seat and place setting for your imaginary friend. Wander around the restaurant asking other diners for their parsley. Slurp your soup. Eat out with your friends and forget your wallet. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon or pay for your dinner with pennies. Getting a rise out of people by annoying the heck out of them was never this easy before chat rooms. First, ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE or only type in lowercase, and dont use any punctuation either. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations and see if people play along to avoid looking ignorant, if they ask what it means be demeaning and rude rather than giving them an explanation. TalkLikeThisInChatRooms. CapitalizeTheBeginningOfEveryWordAndNeverUseSpaces. YouHaveNoIdeaHowAnnoyingThisCanGet. On the other hand, you could simply capitalize letters that ShouLDn't bE capitalized. Go into random chat rooms and say "Turkey," then leave and every 5 minutes, on the dot, send someone an instant message saying "Turkey" as well. Choose someone you do not like and annoy him/her until he/she leaves the chat room. Use the "find member" command and follow this person all over whatever online service you use. This may get you permanently kicked out of all the chat rooms,...
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