Eulogy For Father

When I was a little girl my daddy always talked to me as he did when I was a lot older. He would say, “Are you always gonna be daddy's little girl and never grow up and leave daddy.”
I would say, “No daddy I would never leave you or mommy.” “Do you promise forever?”
I would always say, “Yes daddy never ever will I leave you.” I realize now that I did not know what forever meant.
I know now that I truly did not know forever would come. It has came and went and I am still depressed as can be. The tears still flood my eyes when I see something that reminds me of him like a picture or something it just breaks me into.
I am hurting still. I wish forever would never had come. I would have stayed little my whole life through, but I know now that forever has come and I have no daddy still. I hate it with all my heart, as it
If ever it does I may feel like breathing again. I sure miss my daddy he was a great mother to me.
He did things like buy me pretty clothes because I was daddy's little girl even when he had others after me that were his children he still treated me as he loved me. When the other siblings driving him crazy did not obey or they would mistreat him or overstep their boundaries I did never have greed as they did and I know that they must have deep regret, because of the way the look or look down never looking into my eyes to see my breaking and aching heart. I wonder how I can go on and still, I know that I must.
I try to get out of this house I feel so empty with out my dad there. I am sad as I can possibly be even though I did something drastic to change it I still feel so empty. All day long I try and stay busy but at night in my sleep I hear I talk and I am talking to mommy and daddy.
My goodness even though I do not remember my dream where I am talking I think my God I was very small to use that language even in a