THE Five LOVE LANGUAGES
How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate
NORTHFIELD PUBLISHING CHICAGO
© 1992, 1995, 2004 by Gary D. Chapman All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews. Scripture quotations, unless noted otherwise, are taken from the Holy Bible: New International Version®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved. The use of selected references from various versions of the Bible in this publication does not necessarily imply publisher endorsement of the versions in their entirety. ISBN: 978-1-881273-15-6
To Karolyn, Shelley, and Derek
Other Great Books by Gary Chapman
The Five Love Languages Men’s Edition The Five Love Languages Gift Edition The Five Love Languages of Children The Five Love Languages of Teenagers The Five Love Languages for Singles Your Gift of Love Parenting Your Adult Child The Other Side of Love Loving Solutions Five Signs of a Loving Family Toward a Growing Marriage Hope for the Separated Covenant Marriage
1. What Happens to Love After the Wedding? 2. Keeping the Love Tank Full 3. Falling in Love 4. Love Language #1: Words of Affirmation 5. Love Language #2: Quality Time 6. Love Language #3: Receiving Gifts 7. Love Language #4: Acts of Service 8. Love Language #5: Physical Touch 9. Discovering Your Primary Love Language 10. Love Is a Choice 11. Love Makes the Difference 12. Loving the Unlovely 13. Children and Love Languages 14. A Personal Word The Five Love Languages Profile for Husbands
The Five Love Languages Profile for Wives
Love begins, or should begin, at home. For me that means Sam and Grace, Dad and Mom, who have loved me for more than fifty years. Without them I would still be seeking love instead of writing about it. Home also means Karolyn, to whom I have been married for more than forty years. If all wives loved as she does, fewer men would be looking over the fence. Shelley and Derek are now out of the nest, exploring new worlds, but I feel secure in the warmth of their love. I am blessed and grateful. I am indebted to a host of professionals who have influenced my concepts of love. Among them are psychiatrists Ross Campbell, Judson Swihart, and Scott Peck. For editorial assistance, I am indebted to Debbie Barr and Cathy Peterson. The technical expertise of Tricia Kube and Don Schmidt made it possible to meet publication deadlines. Last, and most important, I want to express my gratitude to the hundreds of couples who, over the past thirty years, have shared the intimate side of their lives with me. This book is a tribute to their honesty.
At 30,000 feet, somewhere between Buffalo and Dallas,
he put his magazine in his seat pocket, turned in my direction, and asked, “What kind of work do you do?” “I do marriage counseling and lead marriage enrichment seminars,” I said matter-of-factly. “I’ve been wanting to ask someone this for a long time,” he said. “What happens to the love after you get married?” Relinquishing my hopes of getting a nap, I asked, “What do you mean?” “Well,” he said, “I’ve been married three times, and each time, it was wonderful before we got married, but somehow after the wedding it all fell apart. All the love I thought I had for her and the love she seemed to have for me evaporated. I am a fairly intelligent person. I operate a successful business, but I don’t understand it.” “How long were you married?” I asked. “The first one lasted about ten years. The second time, we were married three years, and the last one, almost six years.” “Did your love evaporate immediately after the...