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Sustaining Relationships

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Sustaining Relationships
“Sustaining Love Relationships… Making it Last”

Last September 3, Dr. Je Jurisprudencia gave a talk about romantic relationships. I personally really wanted to hear this talk since it seemed an interesting one, and my thought about it didn’t fail me.

The talk’s objectives was to understand how one can learn from the present and/or learn or unlearn from the past, how the couple can identify if there are psychological blockages that may affect or limit them in making their relationship last. This way, if they deal with these issues effectively, the couple can become agents of change.

Dr. Je defined what a relationship really is and then discussed Sternberg’s “Triangular Theory of Love” which contains passion, intimacy and commitment. I have heard and read about this before but it made me feel better that I was more enlightened. I have an almost 4-year relationship with my boyfriend and I couldn’t be gladder to know that we have a consummate type of love. I learned that intimacy is not just being physically close or having sexual interactions, but it’s a way of allowing another person to see into us, to share who we are with another person and in turn, having precious shared moments with one another. The most important thing that I probably understood was that you should allow your partner to be himself/herself rather than changing him/her. Men and women are naturally different and we shall not try to change these differences, even with good intentions. That is if you want to have an effective intimate relationship. Dr. Je, then discussed the different kinds of intimacy and I found myself smiling at each type since it was very heartwarming to find out that my own relationship has all these different types of intimacy… From discussing our thoughts, doing things together, share emotions, talk about spiritual realizations, and from just making each other feel loved and special.

Of course no relationship is perfect. I found Dr. Je’s discussion about

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