obsessions

My mother was extremely over protective with me when I was growing up to the point of an obsession. I was born a twin and my brother died at birth due to complications that is when my mother’s overprotective obsession began. As far back as I can remember I was never allowed off the front porch. I remember being around 5 years old and would love to run through the living room through what seemed to be the longest hallway with wood floors to the front door. Usually the door would be open and the screen door was easy to open. I would open the screen and stand on the front porch and look at the green grass and white fence and I would look at the bright blue sky. My mother would quickly come get me and tell me not to ever leave the front porch.
My mother continued to be overprotective in my adolescent years also. In junior high, I was about 13 or 14 years old my mother would not let me spend the night at my friend’s house. After school a lot of the girls would go to each other’s house and spend the night. I did not spend the night anywhere except with my mother at our house. I had friends spend the night at my house, but never anywhere else not even my grandmas. My mother always had a warmed cooked meal ready at dinner time. Then it was bath time, story time, and bed. My mother was so obsessed with my safety that she would leave the hallway light on and my bedroom door always had to remain open. It even went to as far as she would make my father go outside and walk around the house and make sure everything was okay. Anytime my dog Coco made one little itty bitty bark my mother would make my father go outside like a soldier in the night. I can still remember his big, black, stainless steel flashlight. Every night before I went to sleep for as long as I can remember my mom repeated this routine because she was so afraid something would happen to me. This was her constant fear. I remember getting up in the middle of the night to use the restroom, my mother