The Advantages of Positive Parenting

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Linda Brandes
Position Essay Final Draft
Eng 105 section 26
10/10/2012
The Advantages of Positive Parenting
Parenting can easily be considered one of the most difficult jobs on Earth. Kids are not like puppies where you can get one and take care of it while it’s small and cute. Then, when it no longer entertains you, it can be given away to someone else to care for. Kids are a lifelong responsibility. Once they are born, they will always be there: when they are fun, when they are messy and also when they don’t listen and are disobedient. But it is also one of the most rewarding experiences a person can have during their life. So, how does a parent raise happy kids? Katharine Kersey stated that “if we truly honor [our] children, we will do everything within our power to keep their spirits open. When our spirits are open we are energetic and happy. We are relatively free of anger. We are cooperative and want to communicate. We care about what other people have to say to us, and we have no need to hurt others” (15). This should be the goal of every parent. Therefore, in order to guide children in the right direction, parents should make the decision to raise their children in a positive and supportive manner. This is so important because parental choices and actions can either destroy or build the future of their children, kids that are dealt with positively will be more responsive to instruction and direction, and negativity leads to animosity and hard feelings.

The choices and actions of a parent can greatly influence how a child will react to the world. The behaviors of the parental figure have the power to destroy or build the future of their kids. “When the parent is not involved you see [kids] on the streets doing whatever they want, they end up in gangs. In single parent homes, not knowing where the other parent is effects how they interact with other kids. It effects their grades and they get madder…It is so important for a child to have a parent that cares” (Hamlyn). In order show kids that the parents care, there are several things that a parent needs to choose. ·First, they need to choose to be the parent. It is important for the parents and the children to know exactly who is in charge of the situation. Often times parents fail to follow through on instructions for their children. If a child is told to do their chores and refuses, the parent may decide not to enforce their previous command. This is the beginning of losing control. If a parent is going to give instruction it is important to make sure that the child follows through. (Smiley 19-24) ·Second, a parent needs to choose to lead by example. We have all grown up hearing that imitation is the highest form of flattery, well; this is true until you see what you are really like through the actions of your children. Children will imitate all of the words and all of the actions that they see on a daily basis, good or bad. If they see affection, they will give affection, if they see anger then they will act in an angry manner toward others, and if they see a parent lie after they have been told not to lie then the message will be misunderstood. (Smiley 39-44) ·Third, a child needs structure and consistency in their lives. Brad Hamlyn was a prime example of how this is important to young people. While he’s trying to help troubled youth he constantly interacts with them on their level. He told us that by saying hi to them every day and joking with them, he has been able to establish a trusting relationship with them. This allows them to be comfortable when trouble arises and confide in him (Hamlyn). Parents need to do this as well. Be consistent with discipline, responsibilities, and one-on-one time and kids will naturally respond. There are many mistakes that parents make that affect their children. Linda and John Friel give us some insight on these mistakes. One mistake is to baby the child. Every parent wants to shield their children from the harsh...
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