Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury, I have, may it please the court and jury, a few words to say. In the first place, I do not deny anything that the court has against me. Of course, I am here to make an appeal to the court to acknowledge that I did not have any intention to kill Peter Pan. I didn’t mean to severely injure him by any means, but you must understand that he tried to attack me and take someone I dearly cared for. I therefore urge you to listen to my version of the events which happened between me and Peter Pan.
I am sure that few of you have been in an imaginary world before, and even less have been pirates. I therefore plead to you to understand what I am going to say. If, by any chance, you don’t believe me, I have no choice. The maximum I can ask for you to do is to ask my fellow crewmates who have accompanied me on my voyage, assuming that you did not hunt all of them down by now and execute them by now, to tell you if every word I say is true. I daresay just about every word I say is true, although I might use some pirate slangs, so please don’t mind me!
Firstly, I had done as most other pirates, or people, actually, would have done. I mean, if somebody attacks your ship, though I doubt that any of you here have a ship, so I will say house. If somebody attacks your home, who wouldn’t strike back at their opponent, or the person who struck down their house and started the battle first?
I would also argue that I had followed the Code of Honor for all sailors and captains. If another ship attacks our ship, the ship which is being attacked has total allowance to launch attack on that ship!
Peter Pan has been my arch nemesis for many years now, it is absolutely normal for him to hate me. I have no grudge against him now, although I would admit that I did have a grudge against him many years ago, but not now! Peter Pan is also a rather insulting person. He taunted me, because I had a hook...