How Becoming an Adult Has Changed Christmas

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Looking back on past holidays things were much different than they are now. I’m the one paying for and wrapping the presents now, I no longer get to sit back and watch everyone around me do everything; I have to put in a hand and help prepare for the up and coming holiday. My feelings are mixed, I’m not sure if I am happy or sad about doing these things, I guess it’s just a part of getting older and becoming a wife and mother. I often wonder how my parents and grandparents felt about the same things I’m now worrying about and am confused over. I love the holidays, they bring a special joy to my life, they make me smile even if things may not be going as planned in my life; just the thought of family and friends spending time together is a great big deal in my family. I now get to experience the feeling and joys my parents did when they see me opening my presents. My children are so precious and I love having every memorial moment with them. We still do the same things at Grandmas every year nothing has changed except for the fact that I’m a Mother now. I can distinctively remember the Christmas of 2006; it was the year my son (Jaylen) was born. It’s the year I realized that my spoiled days were over and it was not only about me any more. It was the first time I actually realized that I’m Mommy now! It was a very fearful and joyful moment at the same time; my family didn’t pay as much attention to me anymore. They were occupied with my new baby boy (Jaylen), I was extremely happy, they had taken to my son because 18 months earlier they were a little upset that I was going to have a baby(they thought I was too young). My dad was the happiest I have seen him in years, he was a proud grand pap. I’ll admit I was a little jealous because all the attention was no longer on just me I had to now share it. Then again I sat back and thought I’m an adult now and I should not be treated like a baby anymore, so from that point forward I found the grown up I had hidden...
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