DVD Programme 4: Interviewing and Thematic Analysis
Section 4: Interview: Chloe
COMMENTARY: Chloe is a white British woman. She is fifty years old and has had a career as an academic but is currently retraining to be a therapist. She was married and divorced in her twenties. She and her current partner plan to marry later this year. She has no children.
Interview with Chloe
HELEN LUCEY:So we’ve already spoken on the telephone about what the research was about, but just to tell you again that the focus of the interview and the focus of the research that we’re doing is about early relationships and how they have kind of shaped us and how they shape relationships with people when we’re adults. It’s also important to tell you that you, if you want to withdraw from the research at any time, then that’s fine. So you’ve got the right to withdraw your consent at any time during the interview or even afterwards. So if you change your mind about taking part, you can give me a call and the data will be destroyed, or sent back to you, whichever you would prefer. So just wanted to say that.
Can you tell me something about your early relationships when you were a child and how you think those relationships have influenced you later on?
CHLOE:I don’t remember from when I was very little, I remember mostly from, from when my father left. He left when I was about eight, and that’s when I sort of … that’s what I sort of link things back to the most I suppose, to that sort of period of time. My mother was very, very sort of affected by that. She changed a lot when, when he left. And I remember her being sort of quite sort of larking about and playing, quite, quite a playful person. And then when he left she just became really, really down and very, very needy. And I think I sort of, I tried to fill that gap somehow, and, umm fill in for my dad and sort of be, be a grown-up. I sort of did the garden and washed the car and you know, if a plug needed fixing, I would sort of fix the plug, and so I sort of took on that “I’m a strong and helpful person” role, and so I wasn’t sort of being little any more, which was quite weird. And she was, she was very depressed and very sad and … and just very sort of needy and there wasn’t really sort of much room for me, it was … it felt as if everything was, was to do with what she needed, and she needed quite a lot and she got, she got down a lot. And she wasn’t, she wasn’t … she wasn’t very good at … like if I was sad, she would be, pfff, you know, very dismissive about it, what have you got to be sad about? and, so you’re not really allowed to be sad. And if I was very cheery about something it was like: oh, well it’s all right for you, you can be really … do you know what I mean? So you’ve got … you sort of lose both ways and I think, I think that had a strong effect on lots of things. She was very limited in what she could express and what she couldn’t, and the way in ways in which she could express things, but I know she loved me. And she had a hard time. I mean she was … I think her Mum died when she was about four and she’d, you know, that must have had a, you know, again, you know, you sort of see things, how my Mum was with me and the the repercussions that that had and, and then you look at somebody else’s history, and you think well, you know, that must have had something for them as well, you know, and she’s, she was sort of like really well developed in some areas and other things … didn’t have a clue. She couldn’t sort of take on how anybody else felt, it was very much, you know, a bit of a drama queen really, you know, it’s all to do with, with her feelings and you’ve got to sort of limit everything around that because that’s the thing that’s of importance to her, and as a child growing up that’s what you learn.
HELEN LUCEY: Can you tell me about your relationship with your dad and how...