Divorce Analysis

This week’s discussions focus on 3 videos of divorce and how to heal from the traumatic experience of a divorce. Arizona State’s Dr. Sbarra has made of career of researching divorced couples and helping them come to terms with divorce. Dr. Sbarra talks about there’s a point in life where we have major transitions or turning points that impact our life, which he calls “What Now Moments?”. In the TED talk Dr. Sbarra mentions how journaling could help divorcees express emotions, but he mentions it could leave the person stuck in their thoughts making the situation worse. He listed journaling on the list of don’ts, journaling is a way to express our thoughts and feelings, but when your thoughts are sad or vengeful ones how are you supposed to heal? Journaling makes the divorcee
Sbarra thoughts of journaling, I figured instead of bottling our emotions why not write them down. Dr.Sbarra goes on to mention how in the mist of pain we try to cope with drugs and alcohol, 2 very strong antidepressants that cause more harm to oneself. I could attest to dealing with pain and suffering finding myself lost and confused, I turned to alcohol to fight my demons, I would drink to the point of blacking out. Like Dr. Sbarra mentioned “surround yourself with loved ones” (Sbarra, 2013). I remember talking to my mother about my problems, and all she could do was hug me. On the list of Do’s Dr. Sbarra mentions getting enough sleep, after a divorce, divorcees tend to lose sleep because they’re battling with vast amounts of emotions. Women tend to lose sleep than men would, because women take longer to grieve. Dr. Sbarra mentions more people should have more Self Compassion, “providing compassion for yourself and your own suffering” (Sbarra,2013). Apart of Self Compassion Dr. Sbarra breaks into 3 parts: Self Kindness, Mindfulness, Humanity. Self-Kindness- give yourself a break, forgive all your wrong doings. Mindfulness- experience our emotions and let them