Asthma Critique

Topics: Asthma Pages: 3 (1103 words) Published: March 10, 2013
Overall I liked your write up you did a good job. I did offer some micro and macro suggestions below. I did copy and paste your document into word and it appears to be short of the five and a half page minimum? I also highlighted in red some spelling issues and sentence structure issues for your consideration. 1. What is the writer's claim?

* The writers claim is that asthma should be considered a disability in the workforce. 2. What three reasons does the writer give in support of her/his claim? * I didn’t see three reasons to support the claim but you did provide statistics to show how prevalent asthma is. 3. Evaluate the effectiveness of the writer's reasons. Which reasons are believable and which are not believable? Why? * I think given the figures and the facts that were presented that the reasons are believable. I would have liked to see more studies or maybe considerations for why it shouldn’t be considered. 4. Does the writer use credible (believable) sources? Which source or sources are the most valuable to (supportive of) the writer's claim and reasons? Why? * The single source was credible but I would have liked to see more sources to backup the facts, maybe a source that would show if this had been considered in some states or not? 5. What opposing viewpoint or viewpoints does the writer include? * I didn’t see any opposing view.

6. Can you think of an opposing viewpoint or viewpoints that the writer should also include? * Could you maybe include the cost to the employer implementing something like this maybe by looking at the demographics of your current employer and the prevalence of asthma in the workplace you could extrapolate the impact? 7. Remember that if readers have obvious opposing viewpoints, it is better for the writer to address them than to ignore them. 8. What rebuttal or rebuttals does the writer offer to the opposing viewpoint or viewpoints? Evaluate the rebuttal...
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