Analysis Of Alison Bechdel's Are You My Mother

Alison Bechdel’s memoir, Are You My Mother recounts her extremely difficult and painful relationship with her mother as well as the struggles she endures due to her queer identity. For individuals that identify as homosexual, disclosing their sexual identity can often be a negative experience that works to oppress rather than liberate them. This memoir illustrates how a deep, almost obsessive attachment, to a queer individual’s parent can work to further complicate, worsen and intensify the common issues faced by those who decide to “come out of the closet”. This paper will outline how Alison’s deep obsession with her relationship with her mother worked to create both her lesbian identity and a desperate need for her mother’s acceptance of this identity that she is never able to achieve because of negative outcomes that commonly result from “coming out
In a letter responding to Alison’s “coming out of the closet”, her mother writes, “You are young…” (Bechdel, 2012, p. 156). When said by an individual to someone younger, the phrase “you are young” is often used to heed warning and express that the individual’s youth makes them incapable of understanding the significance and possible detrimental implications of their actions. It suggests that the older individual doing the warning has knowledge that one can only acquire with experience and thus, the younger individual should also wait to acquire such knowledge before pursuing their naïve and potentially harmful desires any further. By saying, “you are young”, Alison’s mother expresses her disapproval and suggests that with more life experience, Alison could change her worldview or learn the implications of being a lesbian and thus, change her sexual