Single or Not: Men Can Be Fathers Too
All around the world, there are thousands and thousands of children waiting to be adopted. Some wait for months, others for years, and some have aged out of foster homes and are forced to take the world by storm all on their own. The adoption process, as some have come to learn, is long and grueling; nonetheless, worth it. What is adopting? To be put quite simply, adopting is the act of legally taking another’s child under one’s care and raising the child as one’s own. It is a time consuming course, which involves crucial examination, a vast amount of questions, criminal background checks, and much more for anybody seeking to adopt. Some people may have a lucky adoption process and some may be less successful, hitting a few bumps along the way, or ultimately, not be allowed to take a child home. Unfortunately, it is toughest for single men to become adoptive parents. Kev Sutton, an educator and academic instructor who outlines various job duties, exclaims that “Fair or not, if you’re a single man you will have a more difficult time adopting” (3). One big issue is whether-or-not single men should be allowed to adopt at all. The reason is widely controversial. Sadly, many people are opposed to allowing single men to adopt, for some understandable and some illogical reasons. These reasons go all the way back to old morals, previous crimes having dealt with single men, and for the simple fact that it is uncommon, which puzzles most who encounter this situation. Morals are concerned with the judgment of the goodness or badness of human action or character, so old morals could be defined as what was believed to be good or bad back then and still, at times, now. One of those old morals is the idea that an ideal family consists of two parents. The two parents are most commonly, and idealistically, a male and a female. “Couples have it the easiest, of course, because, by traditional standards, a family is made up of a mother and father,” (Tessier 6). If a single man had gone to an adoption agency, years ago, and applied to adopt a child, there was no way the agencies would’ve accepted him. He would’ve been denied the opportunity because back then then, it just wasn’t done. There are numbers of agencies that still believe and stand by those morals, and “will deny you outright” (Sutton 1). It has also been branded into the heads of many people that it is more likely for men to commit crimes (Allan, and Steffensmeier 1). With their already bad reputations, created by other males, it makes it extremely difficult for single men to attempt an adoption. Although women are, and have been, capable to commit crimes as well, men have more of a reputation and more stats for crimes. In fact, it is even much more common for single women to adopt rather than single men. “Single women-accounted for 30% of the adoptions from the foster care system in 2001. The number of single men is 2 %,” (9), stated Jeffery McDonald, a correspondent for the Christian Science Monitor. An online posting from Good Morning America concluded that “National Adoption Center says that one-third of its adoptions are by single parents” and to no surprise, most are women (5). Overall, it just comes down to the fact that it is uncommon and unknown to hear of a single man wanting to adopt. Again, this falls under the previous reputation that men have been given, and even though not all men are the same, it doesn’t change the reasons why people oppose adoptions of any child by a single man. I, on the other hand, fully believe that even single men, who have met the legal requirements, should be allowed to adopt children. I especially believe that they should have little to no trouble whatsoever, as other couples may have it. I stand firmly with the courageous and loving men who want nothing more to have the honor and the chance in life to be a father. Of course, there will be many out there who will disagree with me. There...
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