Troubling Case Of Abuse, Intentions, And The Esstranged Child Analysis
The Troubling Case of Abuse, Intentions, and the ‘Estranged Child’
When one hears the term ‘estranged child’, there is very specific and purposeful imagery that is crafted. We think of children who have run away without reason, children who alienate their families due to behavior and circumstance. Families who are aching to know why they are missing their final piece. A palpable narrative is created- parents and siblings who don’t understand, family friends who never saw this coming, a community who just wish that the child would come back and explain themselves. Once the child understands and accepts the gravity of their actions, the family can be whole again.
It is such a painful tale that is told again, and again, and again. Just like any tale, it is spun from stories and perspective, and remarkably fictitious.
The language surrounding ‘estranged children’ is a weapon that promotes and encourages a cycle of systematic abuse that has been finally broken. These poor children, who are in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s and beyond. These children are not children, but to their abusers and bystanders that is all they are- …show more content…
And if it is, that's not my fault.
And if it was, I didn't mean it.
And if I did...
You deserved it.”
What happens when 'children' are pushed for more details? Self-blame for disproportionate reactions of another party.
“Well, I told her to stop hitting me so she threw a knife at me, but I deserve it for talking back.”
Children who are venting often write long accounts of dialogue, specifically describing where they are in the room, the sensory experience of the situation. No detail is left unwritten, and in the case that pieces are missing the community asks the posters for clarification and in every instance, I’ve seen this happen, the poster answers the community’s question in length and depth.
Abuse is a system and cycle that is compromised of many choices and manipulations, it does not exist in a
When one hears the term ‘estranged child’, there is very specific and purposeful imagery that is crafted. We think of children who have run away without reason, children who alienate their families due to behavior and circumstance. Families who are aching to know why they are missing their final piece. A palpable narrative is created- parents and siblings who don’t understand, family friends who never saw this coming, a community who just wish that the child would come back and explain themselves. Once the child understands and accepts the gravity of their actions, the family can be whole again.
It is such a painful tale that is told again, and again, and again. Just like any tale, it is spun from stories and perspective, and remarkably fictitious.
The language surrounding ‘estranged children’ is a weapon that promotes and encourages a cycle of systematic abuse that has been finally broken. These poor children, who are in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s and beyond. These children are not children, but to their abusers and bystanders that is all they are- …show more content…
And if it is, that's not my fault.
And if it was, I didn't mean it.
And if I did...
You deserved it.”
What happens when 'children' are pushed for more details? Self-blame for disproportionate reactions of another party.
“Well, I told her to stop hitting me so she threw a knife at me, but I deserve it for talking back.”
Children who are venting often write long accounts of dialogue, specifically describing where they are in the room, the sensory experience of the situation. No detail is left unwritten, and in the case that pieces are missing the community asks the posters for clarification and in every instance, I’ve seen this happen, the poster answers the community’s question in length and depth.
Abuse is a system and cycle that is compromised of many choices and manipulations, it does not exist in a