Introductory Interview

Introductory Interview
My introductory interview took place on Saturday 8, November 2012 in the arts block of the National University of Ireland Maynooth. The night before my interview I decided to read over my notes and handouts to refresh what I have learnt to date. I was feeling tense about how my day would progress. I was aware that I would not be asked to complete something I hadn’t done already, but for some reason I couldn’t convince myself of that.
I arranged to travel to the venue with my colleagues so that we could support each other in getting there. We finally arrive and I began to feel anxious. Our tutor outlined our agenda and we proceeded to begin our roll as counsellor, client, and observer. My first task as counsellor was to focus on being present with myself and with my client.
We enter the room that we were going to be completing our exercise. My first impression was how big the room was. I wondered what impact it would have on my session. I also took a dislike to the chairs with a small table attached to the side of them. I did not feel totally at ease sitting on them. I was the first to play the role of counsellor.
I begin my attending skills with an introduction. I outline to my client the length of time our session would last, I talked about confidentiality. I also reassured her that the time was hers to spend speaking, crying or in silence, there was no rules, and I was not expecting anything of her. I also reminded her that I was there to listen. I opened the session with a question “what was it that brought you here today.” My client brought to me a situation that was causing her concern. The theme was on the relationship she was having with her partner. I used para language and gentle eye contact to try and stay connected with my client for the duration of the session.
She continued taking about her friend who lost her partner throughout the year and they didn’t have a will made. This caused anguish in her friends’ life and made my client realise she was in the same situation. She also shared with me that her mum was always outlining to her the importance of feeling secure in the relationship. While my client talked about her partner’s refusal to make the will, I noticed that this was a big dilemma for her by her body language. I replied by asking her how did that make her feel? She used feeling word like difficult and annoyed. I responded with empathy for her in her situation. She moved forward by saying that her partner had children of his own and that the relationship wasn’t great between them. I replied back by asking her to tell me more about how that affects her. She replied by saying that she felt responsible for taking the kids Daddy away from them. I replied with empathy for how she felt and asked her to talk a bit more on why she felt she was responsible. She spends some time in silence and I felt comfortable waiting on her reply. While my client was working out why she felt responsible, she replied in a positive way by saying that she was not totally responsible for the relationship difficulties between her partner and his children. She felt that the children had a big part to play in the negative relationship between them. I allow some time for my client to reflect on what she had just said. I then remind her that I was conscious of time and that we had a few more minutes before our session would come to a close. I asked if she had anything else that she would like to add to the session. She replied no. I then ask her how she felt the session went.
I felt relieved when the session was over. I was pleased with my attending skills, but I did feel that I wasn’t in the frame of mind I wanted to be in. I didn’t feel there was enough rapport with my client. While I am recalling the session from my notes I am becoming aware that I didn’t stick to the clients exacts word when I was reflecting it back to her. I also thought that I focused and maybe pushed too much on getting her to talk about her feelings. I also thought that I was naming feelings that she may not be feeling for example (how does that affect you). I felt comfortable for the first time closing the session because it ended on a positive feeling for her. I did find the session hard to complete.
While I reflect on my colleagues hand out on his experience of the session as observer. I was pleasantly surprised with his charitable comments. However he made me aware of things that I could improve on. The biggest revelation was when he said at times I had closed hands throughout the session .This for me was a reflection on how I was feeling. I had never done this in my previous triads. Acknowledging this will make me more conscious in the future. He also reminded me that at times I tended to give answers rather than leave the question open.
The feedback from my client didn’t reflect on how I thought the session went. I didn’t receive any negative feedback. She felt I listened, showed empathy and allowed her the time to explore her feelings about her relationship.
My overall experience from the day’s session was very positive. The principal learning of my experience and my colleague’s feedback is to allow my client to lead me rather than for me lead my client. It is a lot easier in theory than in practice. Every time I complete a triad session I learn sometime new about myself. I am learning about my weaknesses and strengths. I am gaining an understanding of the importance of working in triads and how we can learn from each other. I did feel that being in a different and much bigger environment had an impact on my performance.