Writing and Deep Breath

I turned over the question paper and quickly through the titles. I almost fainted with fear. It just wasn’t happening. All the titles seemed alien to me. My mind went totally blank. I had written so many essays when I was revising but now, I could not even start on any of the topics! Suddenly, I started shivering. I couldn’t control myself. I put my head down on the desk and tried to control my breathing. I was going to cry. I had written two essays the night before. I had gone through all the questions that our teacher had given us. Why couldn’t I remember anything? ``Are you all right?’’ It was the invigilator. He was very concerned. ``Yes, yes. I am fine.’’ The invigilator didn’t seem convinced. He stood near my table. That made me even more nervous. I started shivering again. He stared at me as if I had done something wrong. I looked around me. Everyone had their heads down and were busily writing away. Suddenly, I felt a strange sense of calmness falling over me. I picked up my pen and started writing. What I wrote I don’t know but I managed to fill two foolscap papers. I was numb with shock and fear. What was happening to me. Pretty soon, the bell rang and we passed up our papers. As soon as we got out of the examination hall, we began to discuss our answers. I shut myself off.
What did it matter? I would fail anyway. It was over. When I returned home, my mother asked me how the paper was. ``Fine’’ I mumbled and went to my room. There, on the table were the essays I had written. I had taken the trouble to find suitable vocabulary and thrown in suitable proverbs and famous quotations. I took another deep breath. Never mind. I could not turn the clock back. I told myself firmly not to worry. What’s done is done… as the saying goes.