Why I Want To Become A Serial Killer

What instigates the actions of murderers has always intrigued me, particularly with children who kill and serial killers, this has inevitably led me to want to pursue a career that involves Psychology.
Learning about the inner-workings of the mind has always enthralled me, especially when regarding violence and aggression. I discovered this when I was roughly around the age of 11, I had been surfing YouTube and had stumbled across a video about young children who had committed murder. As a young child I mainly watched these videos for the frightening aspect of it but as I became older I began to investigate the reasons behind the murder. I binge watched short videos and documentaries and every time after I had finished, I would reflect upon the fact, which endlessly disturbed me, that there were children, around the same age
I would race to finish my classwork so then I could peacefully read FBI reports on prolific serial killers. I became aware of the environments they grew up in and how many of them were treated, this new discovery prompted me to investigate the effect their conditions had on them. I learned that many of them had Antisocial Personality Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and/or various combinations of other behavioral abnormalities. Not fully understanding these disorders, I felt compelled to take upon myself to try to comprehend their behaviors in an academic setting. As a result, I purchased books on criminal psychology that went in-depth to explain their behavior and I took a Psychology course over the summer hoping to learn about the complexities of the mind and what may be the cause of the behaviors of some of the most remorseless beings, however, being that it was an introductory course I was left unsatiated with countless unanswered