The Way We Really Are Summary

The Changing American Family

I chose the reading, "The Way We Really Are", by Stephanie Coontz. The author's viewpoint focused on the changes in family values over the years that have led to more single mothers and fewer successful marriages. She refers to several quotes from resources about the American family tradition slowly dying. More unwed mothers are emerging, and more women are single, as they believe marriage is secondary to their social and personal commitments.

I believe psychiatrist John Watson and sociologist Amitai Etzioni were wrong in their predictions that true families would be nonexistent by now. Their opinion implies families could only be "true" if the parents were married. Based upon the definition of a traditional family this may be true, but times have changed. We should focus on how we define family today, before we decide if it is or isn't existent.

One must consider the decision young men and unwed mothers make to not immediately get married when an unexpected pregnancy arises. I think this is a responsible decision for many that may ultimately prevent an unstable,
Coontz that perhaps couples are not as determined anymore to uphold the vow of "until death do us part". I think some couples do not work hard enough to make their marriage work or perhaps one spouse is not as flexible as may be necessary to overcome their problems. I should also consider the stress the previous paragraph explained which families must now endure. I believe, as well, that because women and men both work and raise a family it will tend to increase the divorce rate. In addition, as Ms. Coontz explains, our jobs impose greatly upon our personal time. Technological advancements have made it too easy for us to be available to our employers and after hour's interruptions impose upon quality family time we all deserve. These types of adjustments, however, are now considered the norm and parents must do well at balancing their demanding