Personal Narrative: Coming Out

Coming out was one of the most difficult things I have ever done. Two words, just two, stuck like peanut butter on the roof of my mouth. So hesitant to ever actually say those words. In my mind it was so simple, yet so complex. My lips would always shut close and trap the words inside of me whenever I had the urge to just speak those two words. It was so clear in my head yet to the rest of the world it wasn’t. I had no clue that these words would be a pivotal part in identifying me for the rest of my life. Starting middle school was a huge turning point. I really had the chance to reinvent myself and get a fresh start. During this time, I met my best friends, Haley and Bahar. For a while I would talk about my “girlfriend” and anything else a stereotypical boy would talk about. For a while I was just fine with that; however, I started to feel different. I didn’t feel the things that most boys felt. I didn’t have the urge to talk about girls. It was actually the opposite. I wasn’t quite sure what those feelings meant, but I didn’t like them. I wanted to hide.
My first one ever. I tried really hard to do what any other boyfriend would do and I held hands with her and everything. Everything was good for a while, but those feelings came back again. I felt as if every time I held hands with her, hugged her, I would feel forced to, I didn’t want to. These feelings eventually started to show, and she broke up with me. I was hurt, but I was more relieved than anything else. I could finally, truly reinvent myself. This was all a great idea at the time; however, I still had no clue as to exactly what I was