“THE BUCKET LIST”
By: Cecelia Z. Harrison
There are five stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. With these stages come the knowledge of grief and its effects on us which equips us to cope with life and loss. These stages are responses to loss that many people have, but there is not a typical response to loss as there is no typical loss. Our grief is as individual as our lives. The five stages are, denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance which is the foundation of learning to live with the “lost”. They are tools to help us identify what we may be feeling. Not everyone goes through all of them nor do they go through them in a set order. Denial is the first stage of grieving in this stage the world becomes meaningless and overwhelming. Life makes no sense. We are in a state of shock and denial. We go numb. We wonder how we can go on, if we can go on, why we should go on. We try to find a way to simply get through each day. Denial and shock help us to cope and make survival possible. Denial helps us to pace our feelings of grief. There is a grace in denial. It is nature’s way of letting in only as much as we can handle. As you accept the reality of the loss and start to ask yourself questions, you are unknowingly beginning the healing process. You are becoming stronger, and the denial is beginning to fade. But as you proceed, all the feelings you were denying begin to surface and anger follows. Anger is a necessary stage of the healing process; you should embrace your angry feelings, even though it may seem endless. The more you truly feel it, the more it will begin to fade and the more you will heal. The truth is that anger has no limits. It can extend not only to your friends, the doctors, your family, yourself and your loved ones. You may ask, “Where is God in this? Underneath anger is pain, your pain. It is natural to feel...