Alan's Gone?-Personal Narrative

I stood hopelessly in the corner of a small, sterile room with white walls and fluorescent lights that hummed softly overhead. Here, where my older brothers Alan and Denny sat next to each other, Alan lay pale and weak in bed, looking so small and fragile, like he was just a shadow of the boy he used to be. Denny sat down beside him quietly with his thick voice filled with tears.

I didn't understand what was happening, as I was young and all I know is that Alan is gone. that's what Denny told me at least before he made me leave the scary room and I started thinking about what he means by “gone”? Is Alan going on a long trip or something? Or maybe he has gone to a fantasy world just like Alice in Wonderland did, he would always read me her
if only” and I know he was talking to Alan, trying to bring him back, but it was impossible as Alan loved his new place and left us behind like a forgotten toy. Denny talked about catching all the kids playing in the rye field before they fall off the cliff, always worried about protecting people, especially me. I started thinking only if he could protect Alan from leaving, maybe he would not have to wear his silly hat anymore. A few days before Christmas, Denny came home from school after getting expelled, looking tired and sad like he always did. But this time he had something in his hands, it was his red hunting hat that I know he loved, he wore it everywhere, he said it made him look special and maybe he was. He sat down next to me in bed and handed me that hat “here phoebe” he said. “I want you to have this” i looked at the hat confused “ but Denny this is your hat”,i said. “I know,” he said. “But I want you to have it, I want you to have something of mine to remember me by” At this moment I realised that he is leaving too, just like Alan did and I won't see him ever again, which scared me more than anything, more than dark rooms, more than ghosts, more than thunder, and even more than monsters under bed. Because I know if Denny left, I would be alone for thousands and thousands of years. I put the silly looking hat on my head and he smiled at me and said,