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My Life CHanged

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Topics: Anxiety, Worry, Mother
My Life Changed Leaving the clinic on that very day tears poured down my eyes as I tried to swallow the news the doctor had just given me. I grabbed my cell phone dialed 7 digits… no answer I hung up the phone and sat in total shock and disbelief, as I was about to start my car and leave my phone began to ring my throat tight palms sweaty I answered and muttered two drastic words I’M PREGNANT! The person on the other line must’ve been as shock as I was to hear those words “WHAT” they asked as I repeated myself I’M PREGNANT!
Finding out I was pregnant was both the happiest and scariest moment of my life, immediately I thought about the physical, emotional, and financial aspect of it all. Here I was a 22 year old with no job living with my parents I surely did not plan are picture this for my life I’d had liked to be financially stable in my own place with a job and not having to depend on anybody for anything but I guess things don’t work out the way we plan and sometimes we have to play the cards that are dealt.
As the months came and went my physical appearance changed my hips began to widen and my nose got really fat my ankles where so badly swollen that it felt like I was walking on glass every step I took I was MISERABLE! I had shortness of breath every time I’d walk. I could no longer enjoy sleeping on my stomach I had to sleep uncomfortably on my side I was never able to get comfortable. But to everyone else it was beautiful and they said I had a glow which I never saw. Also my emotions where so crazy I had so many mood swings and didn’t know why. I remember my mom had went to work and left me at home by myself and I started crying like I don’t even know why I just started crying she said it was because of pregnancy hormones. I’d cry for everything like I was so depressed I couldn’t believe this was happening jobless and still leaving at home with my parents expecting a child of my own I felt overwhelmed I had to grow up fast and figure out how to be a good mother and figure out how I was going to financially take of my baby, my parents said they’d help me as much as they could but it was not their responsibility because they didn’t help make the child.
I ended up finding a job and although I didn’t work their too long before I had to go on maternity leave I was able to collect a few checks and put them aside so it felt good that I was able to save and be able to buy my child diapers, wipes and other little necessities before the birth, so my worrying started to go away once I got a job I felt secure. After all the doubting and sleepless nights the moment had come I was finally going to meet my child you would have thought it been a happy moment for me but I was terrified my heart beating fast and my forehead rolling down with sweat, my family said a quick prayer over me and I was wheeled off into surgery going into the operating room and seeing all the different types of tools had me very worried but I knew I was in good hands my parents both kissed me and told me they loved me and with that I was put to sleep and when I woke my daughter was here 8lbs 8oz and what a joy she was even though I was in and out of consciousness I was able to see how beautiful she was she smiled up at me a tear rolled down my cheek and at that very moment all the worries and stress of not being able to take care of my child overcame with the happiness and joy I was filled with, I didn’t care about those things anymore my daughter was her I was overjoyed with excitement and I couldn’t believe that I had created something so precious. Some unexpected predicaments come as a shock to us all it just depends on how that individual handles the situation learning the news of being pregnant was a hard pill to swallow, but now that my daughter is here she truly is a blessing to me and I wouldn’t change her for anything in the world.

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