Will Your Marriage Last?
Aviva Patz, author of “Will Your Marriage Last” is a divorced and remarried woman who lives in fear that her second marriage will not last. She decided to attend a seminar in Boston instructed by Ted Huston, a professor at the University of Texas who introduces the study of the outcome of marriage.
After a thirteen year study, Huston claims that in the early years will determine the length of your marriage. Really focusing on the first two years of newly wedded couples, it can be predicted the result of the marriage based on their actions and emotions. But can the length of the marriage really be based off of two years? Most couples spend the first couple years growing together and becoming one. The conclusion he found was many newlyweds that are far from love last longer than the ones who are blissfully in love. That is because it is extremely hard to maintain the intensity.
Huston quotes Reis who says lots of marriages end in distress and divorce because the loss of intimacy, in a sense that the feeling of there’s no one else who can really understand you starts to fade. Marriages end because so much hurt has been engendered over the years that it is simply impossible to get beyond it. Couples start to lose respect for the relationship and the spouse.
The author illustrates a classic disillusionment by using Peter and Suzie as an example. They didn’t date long, go married and fell out of love. They story makes Patz realize all the mistakes that has happened in her past marriage. Al couples go through the honeymoon stage but only the successful couples will make the right commitment.
Patz starts to reflect on her past marriage and what she could have done to save it, but then decides her relationship was even bad before marriage. She decides culture is to blame for peer pressure of being married and unrealistic relationships. But it seems that she used the seminar and culture as an excuse why her first marriage failed.
After a thirteen year study, Huston claims that in the early years will determine the length of your marriage. Really focusing on the first two years of newly wedded couples, it can be predicted the result of the marriage based on their actions and emotions. But can the length of the marriage really be based off of two years? Most couples spend the first couple years growing together and becoming one. The conclusion he found was many newlyweds that are far from love last longer than the ones who are blissfully in love. That is because it is extremely hard to maintain the intensity.
Huston quotes Reis who says lots of marriages end in distress and divorce because the loss of intimacy, in a sense that the feeling of there’s no one else who can really understand you starts to fade. Marriages end because so much hurt has been engendered over the years that it is simply impossible to get beyond it. Couples start to lose respect for the relationship and the spouse.
The author illustrates a classic disillusionment by using Peter and Suzie as an example. They didn’t date long, go married and fell out of love. They story makes Patz realize all the mistakes that has happened in her past marriage. Al couples go through the honeymoon stage but only the successful couples will make the right commitment.
Patz starts to reflect on her past marriage and what she could have done to save it, but then decides her relationship was even bad before marriage. She decides culture is to blame for peer pressure of being married and unrealistic relationships. But it seems that she used the seminar and culture as an excuse why her first marriage failed.