Strategies For Success

Stress is part of daily life, more in some people’s lives than others. Not one person can compare their stresses with other’s as they do not know how another person deals with situations internally. My stress may seem more prevalent than that of others, and here I may be keeping a negative situation stoked with that mindset. Identifying what stresses me out, learning how to cope and overcome, and taking steps to do so is the right steps to achieving some of my values and goals.
On the steps I have read by L. Lamberton and L. Minor in the textbook, “Human Relations: Strategies for Success”, on how to build a higher self esteem (p36-40) I chose three instead of two. I could have listed them all, although, it would be counterproductive as I wouldn’t
I decided that I could work on developing a better internal locus of control . With the many tribulations going on, I feel like not only am I not in control, but have lost control, over my life currently. I have developed into a “Why me?” and “What else can go wrong” mentality. The next step I decide I can work on, to stop procrastinating, I chose because I have a bad habit of procrastinating. I not only do this with homework, but also with paying bills, grocery shopping, replying to emails, letters, voicemail, messages, etc. It has affected my life and also has created more stress for me to deal with. I want to say I don’t know why I do this to myself, however, I would be practicing denial. I procrastinate from being overwhelmed and out of fear. So I end up taking time to
o Lastly, I just need to start. Whether it be a baby step or a flippy-floppy jump like a fish out of water, I just need to start.
My third step to work on I worked out some different steps to try rather the same thing I have done before, which was saying certain affirmations each day or during certain types of situations. I took some ideas from an article, “5 Tips to Improve Your Self Talk” by Polly Campbell. Those are:
• Create a psychological distance from myself. o Instead of using a first person diagnosed of “Why am I so upset?” I can use more of a second person dialog of “Why are YOU so upset?”. Campbell writes how Ethan Kross, PhD, the laboratory director of the Emotion & Self-Control Lab at the University of Michigan, stated, “People who use their own name or ‘you’ begin to think of the task more as an interesting challenge rather than as a threat.”
• Treat myself as a friend. o If I can treat myself compassionately as I would a friend I believe I can lower my stress levels
• Say “I don’t” vs “I can’t”, and what focus on what I “do” want instead of what I “don’t”