A wedding ceremony in my family, as Indonesian Chinese, is quite complicated. There are a lot
of things to do before the wedding, such as the proposal. The future groom will have a very
important role in the proposal and in the wedding. A lot of rules need to be followed not only by
the future groom and bride but also their family members. Usually it will take a long time
—usually about a year— to organize the proposal and the wedding. Besides taking a lot of time,
it will also cost a lot of money.
Before a wedding, there will be a proposal. The proposal is the most important part which must
be followed by the groom’s family and the bride’s family. In my family tradition, when the future
groom wants to propose the future bride, he and his family have to come to the future bride’s
house. There are several things that need to be brought to the house which sometimes are
expensive and cost a lot of money. The future groom has to prepare nine or eight baskets fill with
things, such as clothes, shoes, fruits (apples and oranges), canned fruits and jewelries. My family
believe that this is the key to happiness for the couple.
On the proposal day, when the future groom and his family have arrived at the future bride’s
house, each person from the future groom’s family —about eight to nine people— bring one
basket. Then there will be another eight to nine people standing in front of the door of the bride’s
house which will be given one by one to each person and they will bring the baskets into the
house. After this process, the future bride’s family will host the future groom’s family for lunch.
After the proposal, the engaged couple have to arrange their wedding. Just like other weddings in
other cultures, they have to find a perfect wedding cake, a perfect wedding gown, the rings, the
place where the ceremony will be held and other things needed for couple who are about to get
married.