You Live and You Learn
You Live and You Learn
Marriage is not always what you expect it to be. In today’s society, marriage is taken lightly and it doesn’t always end in, “happily ever after.” In the essay “Second Marriage”, the writer describes her learning experience with her first marriage and how she applied what she learned to her second marriage. The message that’s conveyed in the essay is that in marriage, it’s not only important to grow together as a couple, but also grow as individual people to strengthen the bond. Marriage is not always occupying the same space together, but it’s also about the space between. Marriage requires the commitment to work together and respect each other as unique individuals with their own goals, gifts, and aspirations.
In her first marriage the writer described herself as a “clinging vine”. Why is it that women or men for that fact become clingy? In my opinion being too clingy can damage a relationship ending in its demise. A relationship is like a plant that needs to be nurtured and cultivated. Without giving space to a significant other, boyfriend, or husband you are suffocating the relationship. Relationships are based on trust, respect and love. And it starts within one self. One needs to love oneself before loving others. Couples suffer due to lack of self-love and confidence. The need to have someone just to feel complete and/or significant, relationships based in such ideology will never have real relationships or a strong foundation to base it on. My first marriage was similar to the writers. All our free time was spent together and it caused us to always be on edge when we were around each other. We would fight and argue like children with no resolution to our problems. He would storm off and I would lock myself in the room. We did not face our problems like adults I thought marriage was forever. In this marriage that was not the case.
Similar to the essay, the story “Salvation” by Langston Hughes, he writes about his relationship
Marriage is not always what you expect it to be. In today’s society, marriage is taken lightly and it doesn’t always end in, “happily ever after.” In the essay “Second Marriage”, the writer describes her learning experience with her first marriage and how she applied what she learned to her second marriage. The message that’s conveyed in the essay is that in marriage, it’s not only important to grow together as a couple, but also grow as individual people to strengthen the bond. Marriage is not always occupying the same space together, but it’s also about the space between. Marriage requires the commitment to work together and respect each other as unique individuals with their own goals, gifts, and aspirations.
In her first marriage the writer described herself as a “clinging vine”. Why is it that women or men for that fact become clingy? In my opinion being too clingy can damage a relationship ending in its demise. A relationship is like a plant that needs to be nurtured and cultivated. Without giving space to a significant other, boyfriend, or husband you are suffocating the relationship. Relationships are based on trust, respect and love. And it starts within one self. One needs to love oneself before loving others. Couples suffer due to lack of self-love and confidence. The need to have someone just to feel complete and/or significant, relationships based in such ideology will never have real relationships or a strong foundation to base it on. My first marriage was similar to the writers. All our free time was spent together and it caused us to always be on edge when we were around each other. We would fight and argue like children with no resolution to our problems. He would storm off and I would lock myself in the room. We did not face our problems like adults I thought marriage was forever. In this marriage that was not the case.
Similar to the essay, the story “Salvation” by Langston Hughes, he writes about his relationship
Cited: Hughes, Langston. “Salvation.” Student Book of College English. Eds. Skwire and Wiener.Pearson:Boston, 2012. 61-63 “Second Marriage.” Class Handout. n.d.