Why Is Jealousy Important To Our Identity?

Jealousy is one of these of the most challenging feelings to anyone in a romantic relationship. However, one doesn’t need to be in a relationship to feel jealous, for there are many other things to be jealous about, such as possessions or experiences. It occurs when there is a threat to losing something or someone, for instance our partner, job or material things. This feeling is quite similar to envy which occurs when we lack something or want to have something that the other person has.

The experience of jealousy has been described as intrusive and challenging to one’s sense of self and relationships. It’s like an uninvited guest - we become jealous when a person enters into our life and threatens our relationship or possession or social status. But threatens what exactly? Our right of ownership - we believe that we own a person we are in a relationship with or that we own a particular social role. In theory, if we only reduced our attachment to everything and everyone, so would the possibility of getting jealous reduce. But where is the limit if relationships are based on attachment, if our social roles play a significant role to our identity?

Since all feelings have a purpose - otherwise we wouldn’t have them on the first place, so
When being jealous, we become insecure and anxious. Once again, it is caused by our belief that whatever we feel attached to, we own it, and whatever we own defines who we are. Although it might be true that various relationships or possessions or social roles shape our identity, it is necessary to understand that our identity is not entirely us - it is merely a social projection or an act that helps others to define or label us. Identity is very different to who we truly are. I might be defined as a coach by the society, but it doesn’t mean that my whole self is a coach. Being a coach is just a part of the whole complexity of the