Journal of Suzanne Valadon, model and apprentice of Henry Toulouse-Lautrec.
Paris, July 25 1889
It’s a calm Sunday afternoon. I just woke up next to Toulouse. He’s still snoring, probably due to the large amount of alcohol he had last night. Absinthe in abundance in the crazy bohemian Parisians nights. Toulouse always drinks too much, no one realizes because everyone enjoys drinking every night but I can see he’s not far from being an alcoholic. It’s going to kill him someday. He had that funny walk when we got home, he looks as a child, with his short height, staggering from left to right. I know it’s a subject he doesn’t usually talks about, his height. I heard the story from someone at a table one night. He was 14, no 13, when his accident happened. After fracturing his thighbone, the break didn’t heal properly and his legs stopped growing, meanwhile the rest of his body kept a normal size. During his convalescence period he got pushed by his mother to paint and draw. He didn’t spend time with children his age but rather develop his art skills. Anyhow Toulouse never had a good health maybe it's because of his origins. He confessed that he came, from an aristocrat family keeping marriage among them. Incest never turns out good. Toulouse has a certain fascination for brothels. We hadn’t seen each other for a week now because he was in one of them. This place of sexual enjoyment is its little shelter; he enjoys the environment of love and pleasures. He has become very close to all the prostitutes; he has started to gain their trust. He stays days and nights, watching and painting the female’s lifestyle in the house, especially in their intimate moments. Women have become one of his favorites subject in his work. Also Toulouse began to work on posters for the cabaret the Moulin Rouge. I always see him with a toothbrush in his pocket to splat on the lithographic stone to produce tonal effects. I am always captivated when I watch him work doing...
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