The Concept of Divorce

Happy marriages nowadays are an uncommon sight. If you ask people around about happy marriages, they might ask you if such still exists. Of course, that will immediately crush every child’s dream of “fairytale happy endings.” But let us face the reality that not all marriages are perfect, that not all decisions about getting married are really right. Those decisions can only be the best one in the situation some couples face. Not all marriages are always out of love but it can also be just the best solution. If things go wrong along the way, couples can turn for marital dissolution in desperate times. But having marital dissolution is not an easy task at all. One can not simply barge in the court and simply ask the judge for a marital dissolution. There are lots of processes and legal papers involved. Not to mention that one should have lots of money to have it done. It will also take a lot of years before the marriage is finally void. So it is not an easy process and it will surely test someone’s patience. Marital dissolution is becoming common for this generation. When someone talks about it, others cannot help but think about divorce. But how much do people really know about divorce?
If you ask someone what is really divorce, they might just tell you its definition from the dictionary or just ask you to search the definition of the word in Google or any search engines. Then let us try it their way. Divorce, by reportive or exical definition, means “an act or instance of legally dissolving a marriage” (Merriam-Webster Dictionary, 211). The definition seems clear but does it really explain what divorce really is and what it entails?
We already know that divorce is a form of marital dissolution. But there are certain things that make divorce different from the other marital dissolutions like annulment and legal separation.
Each form of marital dissolution has different grounds to consider. The grounds for annulment should happen during the time of celebration of marriage. Some of the grounds include: a lack of parental consent especially if one party is 18 years and over but below 21 years old; an insanity of the spouse; an impotence of the spouse; and a sexually-transmitted disease is confirmed to be carried by the spouse. Homosexuality and physical violence are not enough to annul the marriage.
However, these two can be used as a basis for legal separation. In legal separation, both parties are still considered to be married to each other and cannot remarry another person. A respondent’s attempt to the life of the petitioner and sexual infidelity can also be used as grounds for legal separation.
The grounds for divorce, on the other hand, can happen during the marriage, not just during the time of its celebration. Some of the grounds include: adultery; physical incapacity; and cruel treatment.
Unlike annulment, divorce is not retroactive. It considers the marriage void on the day that the marriage is dissolved. Divorce undergoes different legal processes under the eyes of the authority. Different issues will also be talked about before the marriage is successfully void. Some of these issues include: the custody of the children; the support of the children; the distribution of property; and alimony. Also, divorce laws vary in different countries.
There are actually 2 types of divorce. One is fault-based divorce and the other is no-fault divorce. Fault-based divorce requires proof or ground for the marriage to be void. No-fault divorce requires no proof for the marriage to be void. The mere fact that the marriage is failing will be enough.
One advantage of divorce is that it can lessen the problems in a home. Though it can give both parties a bit of freedom and breathing space, divorce has its few disadvantages as well. As Kalmijn said, “a divorce can be a highly disturbing and emotional experience, and this alone would lead to a reduction of well-being” (Kalmijn, 1198). That may be the reason why “adults an children from divorced families, as a group score lower than their counterparts in married-couple families on a variety of indicators of well-being” (Amato, 1282).
After the divorce, parents usually ask the children to pass the messages between the parents, ask about the activity of the other parent, or perhaps put down the other parent in front of the children. This leads to the children’s behavior problems, poor academic skills, and poor academic performance. Children with parents who were divorced are likely to experience divorce in their married life as well. Just as Strohschein said, “research has consistently found that children of divorced parents are at greater risk for mental health problems and experience lower educational attainment and greater instability in their own intimate relationships as adults” (Strohschein, 358).
Also, “recent research indicates that reaching adulthood does not ameliorate strained relationships between offspring and parents” (Amato, 356). The children are said to have less contact with parents and feels less affection for them. Their obligations to their parents in their adulthood are unlikely to be done.
The effects can also be seen in the children’s social being. “Sociological theories presume that children are harmed by divorce because parents are unable to exercise as much social control and regulation of their child’s behavior. Moreover, single parents are likely to experience more stress that may diminish their capacity to support and nurture their baby” (Furstenberg, 447). Parents are coping up with their lives and that leaves the children to adjust in their own ways.
Divorce might be the dissolution of the marriage but it “does not necessarily mean the dissolution of the family” (Levin, 351). Issues raised about divorce always involve its effects. There are different studies about divorce and it does not always yield the same results. Divorce might seem as an unwise way to other people but to the people who are suffering a failing marriage, it is their only hope to be free. A second chance at happiness to marriage is what they want and they are hoping that a marital dissolution like divorce can give them that.