Talak Talak Talak

Talak - Talak - Talak Prof. Abu Sufian Dept. of History

”You are Divorced! Divorced! Divorced! “These have become the most dreaded three words that any Muslim woman can hear in her lifetime, for they signify not only the end of her marriage, but a hard and difficult road ahead where she has to re-build her entire life when the only foundation she has spent years building has just fallen away. Can it really be so simple! Can years of building, sharing and loving be shattered beyond repair by the mere utterance of words? Lack of proper Islamic knowledge about divorce has led to some misconceptions in society. A comprehensive review of various aspects of divorce can help people understand what divorce actually is. Divorce is one of the institutions of Islam regarding which much misconception prevails, so much so that even the Islamic law as administered in the courts, is not free from these misconceptions “Of all things, which have been permitted, divorce is the most hated by Allah and a man who divorces his wife without a legitimate, genuine cause will be deprived of the fragrance of Paradise” (Dawud, Tirmidhi) Islam has taken all possible measures to make marriage a happy and lasting relationship. Marriage in Islam is a civil contract (nikah) between a man and a woman to live together as husband and wife. It automatically confers mutual rights and duties upon the parties which both must remain mindful of.
Marriage as prescribed by God is the lawful union of a man and women based on mutual consent. Ideally, the purpose of marriage is to foster a state of tranquility, love and compassion in Islam. It is a sacred bond between husband and wife, according to which they are tied to fulfill each other’s rights. Through divorce, man's right as a husband and women right as a wife are aborted. The Quran and the holy Prophet have stressed that both partners should act kindly and fairly with each other. However, for all married couples to have disagreements now and then is quite natural. In case a serious disagreement occurs a procedure is recommended in Islam to help reconcile the situation before a divorce. Islam does its utmost to make people detest divorce and urges Muslims not to resort to it as far as is humanly possible. The Prophet Muhammad said " Marry and do not resort to divorce, for the Throne of God Almighty shakes with every divorce”. . Even if a husband dislikes some qualities in his wife's nature, Islam does not consider this a justification for divorce. He should not contemplate divorce if his feelings for his wife have undergone a change. One should consequently never allow oneself to be controlled by one's whims when making decisions concerning important matters upon which the future of one's family depends. For a person whom one dislikes today may be beloved on tomorrow. As mentioned in the following Quranic verse: [Surah 4: Ayah 19] "O ye who believe! Ye are forbidden to inherit women against their will. Nor should ye treat them with harshness, that ye may take away part of the dower ye have given them, except where they have been guilty of open lewdness; on the contrary live with them on a footing of kindness and equity. If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and Allah brings about through it a great deal of good"

The system ordered by Islam aims at avoiding divorce and the husband and wife who are at discord with each other are commanded to do their utmost to overcome their differences by dealing with each other compassionately and considerately. This is mentioned in the following Quranic verse: "If a woman fears cruelty or desertion on her husband's part, there is no sin on them both if they make terms of peace between themselves; and making peace is better. “[Surah
IV,verse128]
When a husband and wife fail to reconcile their differences with each other, Islam offers that the matter of their discord be discussed at a family meeting in which the husband and the wife are each represented by a member of their families. These representatives act as mediators, and it is their duty to discuss and consider the problems that had caused the discord and to do their utmost to reconcile the points of view of the husband and wife until reconciliation between them is effected. This is stated in the following Quranic verse [4:35] If ye fear a breach between them twain, appoint (two) arbiters, one from his family, and the other from hers; if they wish for peace, Allah will cause their reconciliation: for Allah hath full knowledge, and is acquainted with all things. But, if after exhausting all methods of reconciliation, the hatred between the husband and wife is still greater than tolerance, then divorce becomes inevitable. Here comes the genius of the Islamic law, which holds practical, rather than unrealistic approaches, towards real situations. The ultimate aims of marriage, as well as any other aspect of human life, are to achieve happiness and virtue. So, when people are denied their right to end an unhappy marriage, these two aims are seriously violated. This is, as the couple will live in suffering, which may lead them to marital infidelity. Thus divorce in this case – if weighed up to the disaster of family disintegration - will be less disastrous. Literally, the word divorce means, "undoing the knot," or to get someone free from a bond. Islam ordains that after, a husband divorces his wife once, he is given two options, one of which is to restore his wife during her " iddah " or period of waiting which is approximately three months for a wife who is not pregnant. The wife's return to her husband in this case needs no legal procedure. As told in Quran, [Surah 65:Ayah 2] "Thus when they fulfill their term appointed, either take them back on equitable terms or part with them on equitable terms; and take for witness two persons from among you, endued with justice, and establish the evidence (as) before Allah. Such is the admonition given to him who believes in Allah and the Last Day. And for those who fear Allah, He (ever) prepares a way out." In order to encourage a husband to restore his divorced wife, Islam ordains that she live in her marital home during the period of waiting. This is stated in the following Quranic verse [65: 1] "O Prophet! When ye do divorce women, divorce them at their prescribed periods, and count (accurately) their prescribed periods: and fear Allah your Lord: and turn them not out of their houses, nor shall they (themselves) leave, except in case they are guilty of some open lewdness, those are limits set by Allah: and any who transgresses the limits of Allah, does verily wrong his (own) soul: thou knows not if perchance Allah will bring about thereafter some new situation." The period of waiting is really a period of temporary separation during which conjugal relations may be re-established as clearly stated in the words that follow. This period of temporary separation serves as a check upon divorce. If there is any love in the union, its pangs would assert themselves during the period of temporary separation, bringing about reconciliation, and the differences would sink into insignificance. After a husband divorces his wife twice he is left with the right to divorce her only one more time. Islam has made it clear that divorce pronounced in haste by man never becomes binding immediately but gives him a period of three lunar months in which he can think over and then either confirm the divorce or revoke it and seek reconciliation. A third divorce signifies that married life has become intolerable and that the husband and wife have failed to make a success of their marriage. It is at this stage that Islam ordains permanent divorce between them.

It is forbidden to give divorce in menstruation. As stated in Quran, "O Prophet! When you divorce women, divorce them at their 'Iddah' (prescribed periods) and count (accurately their Iddah)" [Surah 65: Ayah 1]. In the event of pregnancy, the Holy Quran imposes additional responsibility. No separation is permissible until after the child is born. Hence she must be properly maintained. As for the child, it’s nursing, welfare, and similarly, the care of the mother remains the father’s responsibility Mothers shall give suck to their offspring for two whole years, if the father wishes to complete the term, but he shall bear the cost of their food and clothing on equitable terms." (Quran sura 2,aya 233). If the husband utters Talak or divorce three times in the same breath, it is considered an irrevocable divorce and there remains no chance of reconciliation between the couple. And under this strict view, which do Quran and Hadith not support. Classical and the modern Islamic scholars also do not support. Many families are broken and the women and children are mostly affected. According to the view supported by Islamic scholars, three or more utterances of divorce at a time are regarded as only one Talak (divorce). But, according to all scholars, to utter such number of divorce at a time is not encouraged in Islam and the person who pursues this undesirable system will be considered sinful. Narrated Abdullah ibn Abbas: "Tawus said: Abus Sahba' said to Ibn Abbas: “Do you know that a divorce by three pronouncements was made a single one during the time of the Prophet (peace be upon him), and of Abu Bakr and in the early days of the caliphate of Umar?” He replied: “Yes.” (Translation of Sunan Abu-Dawud, Book 12, Divorce (Kitab Al-Talaq), Number 2194)So according to this narration, we clearly see that Prophet Muhammad and his Disciples (Caliphs) Abu Bakr and Umar clearly considered the divorce in thrice as a single one. When the wife has been divorced twice, after each of which reconciliation has been effected and has failed, the third divorce becomes irrevocable, and the husband cannot remarry the divorced wife until she has been married elsewhere and divorced. The verse abolishes the immortal custom of halalah, or temporary marriage gone through with no other object than that of legalizing the divorced wife for the first husband, a custom prevalent in the days of Ignorance, but abolished by the Prophet, according to a report which speaks of his having cursed those who indulge in the evil practice (Tr. 9:25). There must be a genuine marriage and a genuine divorce. This restriction makes the third divorce a very rare occurrence, and thus acts as another check against frequent divorce. Islam does not stipulate a list of allowable circumstances for divorce. The holy Quran refers to some causes when divorce may become necessary, but it does not restrict them to a fixed list. The grounds to seek divorce are entrusted to the individuals’ conscience. The general cause of divorce in Quran is the hopeless failure of one or both parties to discharge their marital duties and to live together with kindness, peace and compassion. There may be a reason for aversion between both the spouses which may not seem important to an arbitrator but which may be sufficient to spoil the marital relations between them. In the absence of a genuine reason, no Muslim can justify a divorce in the eyes of either religion or law. A Summary of the Rules for Divorce: A ‘cooling-off’ period of four months is required before commencing a divorce. (Quran 2:226) If they still insist on divorce, then the wife and husband must remain together in the same home during the ‘interim-period.’ (Quran 65:1) If the couple reconcile, then divorce may be retracted and cancelled at any point during the interim period. (Quran 2:229) The divorce is automatically retracted if sexual intercourse takes place between the husband and wife during the interim period. (Quran 65:1) The interim period required is three menstruation periods. The interim for women who no longer menstruate is three months. The interim for pregnant women is until they deliver (Quran 2:228, 65:4) There is no interim period required if the divorce takes place while no sexual intercourse has ever taken place between the couple. (Quran 33:49) If the couple still wishes to follow through with the divorce after the end of the interim period, then two witnesses are required to complete the process. (Quran 65:2) If this is the 3rd divorce, then the couple may not remarry each other unless the woman has been married to another man and then divorced. (Quran 2:230) It should be noted that in Islam the wife also has the right to demand of her husband a divorce. However, instead of "Talaq" it is termed "Khul" and in its literal senses it means releasing or removing the dress from the body. This is an appropriate allusion to the verse of the Holy Quran, which says:
"Women are your garment and you are their garment “. A recalcitrant husband can never chain a Muslim wife Divorce according to Islamic Law is similar to a painful surgery; the sane human being endures the pains of his wound, even an amputation, in order to protect the remaining parts of the body to keep away greater injury. If the aversion between husband and wife is undiminished, and the means of reconciliation and attempts by reconciling parties fail to bring them together, divorce then is the bitter medicine, which has no alternative. This is the reason why if there can be no reconciliation there is divorce.

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