Just like the processes I find sensory description from the public writings, you gave me the same advice about how to develop the final essay in the conference which made me suddenly realized how to deal with the essay. During the conference, you made an example about how to make a detective film. You said that we cannot tell who the murderer is at the beginning of the film, instead, we need to find many clues and connect those clue to find the result. We may find a cloth at the crime scene and find out that it is his brother’s cloth but his brother also cannot be the murderer. We may find other clues from his brother and find out who the murderer is in the end. We need to lead the reader step by step to reach our goal, so I improved my essay using this strategy--I wrote an interesting store to attract readers and made it as a foreshadowing to lead to my main point like the beginning of Baxter’s passage. Another big challenge was how to write an essay not in five paragraphs form. To avoid this problem, I focused on the connection between each paragraph. The five paragraph essay doesn’t have connection between each paragraph and its main paragraphs are in parallel. So I made some delicate connections in my essay: I wrote a real life story of me at the beginning and analyzed one of dialogue in it to find the effect of sensory descriptions. Then I extended to our daily life …show more content…
One of the abilities is to have strong capacity to improve our works. We did many drafts for one essay and we made 80 percent, even 200 percent change each draft. This is what we learned—the strong capacity to improve. And this is why every conference is very important. The goal of conferences is to improve our works. I felt that I gain much knowledge in the fifteen minutes conference every time because I learned how to make revision of my essay clearly. We were divided into two groups to debate. No matter we were the first group to debate or the second group, when I saw the annotations on everyone’s paper, I got to know that we had learnt from the other group and we could improve our debate