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Satirical Essay Ion Drinking and Driving

By Kmalzzz Mar 16, 2011 278 Words
Drinking and Driving

Alcohol - The greatest gift in life. The only reason the world spins. Did you know alcohol can lead to the amazing world of addiction? Yeah, that’s something everyone should get into. If you’re one of the many who decides to try it out, you can become an alcoholic very quickly. Once you’re an alcoholic, your world will soon fall in place. Every day of your life, you will have all the time in the world to just sit around, drink, and do anything you want , since you’re probably out of a job by now. Since you don’t have a job, alcoholism can lead to money problems, so go for the cheap beer and find friends with money so they can buy you all the beer you want. I know just sitting at home drinking isn’t enough sometimes. So when you get to that point, you should try driving under the influence. The blurry vision makes driving so interesting. When you’re driving, try not to get stopped by police. If they catch you drinking and driving, they’ll take you to jail for a night. But remember, if you get caught, you can do it all over again the next day. This behavior will continue for years. You’ll lose all of your friends and family, but don’t worry. You’ll still have that nice cold beer. When you start to feel your life end because of alcohol but it’ll be okay. You should know that you lived your life to its fullest. Drinking is everything life is about. So remember, drink on and live strong.

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