Research Paper

Topics: T. S. Eliot, The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock, Mother Pages: 5 (1289 words) Published: January 11, 2015
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Teacher Name
Academic writing II 
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The Struggle
Over the years, I’ve often wondered what is it about men and women that caused us to be so different, and to think so differently. I’ve tried to understand men, rationalize their thought processes and to be honest it seems unfathomable. Is it the hormones that flow so freely through our bodies or maybe the pheromones in the air? Or perhaps it’s an emotional thing? No one can say for sure, but these were the questions that coursed through my veins as read Daphne Beckham’s essay called, “Perspective on Men.” It’s clear to me that I don’t understand men and they simply don’t understand me. Our uniqueness, our differences only draw us closer with no reason or rhyme, it just simply is. Daphne used her father as a point of reference for her essay. Throughout this paper I will also use my own father. As I became an adult, I thought my relationship with my father would help guide me my relationships with men. Boy was I wrong, it turns out I wouldn’t know a healthy relationship if it slapped me in the face. So I began my research with biblical references, self-help books, chicken soup for the soul, and Daphne’s “Perspective on Men” as I struggled to understand the differences between men and women. Even though I still don’t understand men, I found that men and women are more similar than I originally thought. These revelations began to unravel when I was about 13 as I visited my father’s church. You see my mother and father had different churches and different religions, it’s a long story. Anyway, so it was rare that I got to see my father in action at church. I remember watching him saunter to the front of the congregation and ask the audience to bow their heads. He began to pray: it was a strong and well devised prayer as if he had rehearsed it a 1000 times before. But as time passed slowly (this seemed like the longest prayer ever) his lips began to quiver, he stammered over a few words as tears began to stream down his face one by one. This peeked my curiosity with my head bowed and one eyebrow raised to zero in on dad’s tears and the other eye closed as if I were deep in prayer. In my day, Dads just didn’t cry very often, my dad was much like Daphne’s, “a rock, hard and unmoving.” Unlike Daphne, it didn’t take me many years to realize what was presented to me in that small town church one Sunday morning. That, “these men cried, they made mistakes, and they could feel,” they were human. My Dad always seemed invincible, he was an honest, hardworking man. Most of his time was spent dedicated to the job but in his free time I can remember being glued to his side; chewing on my Big League chewing gum like it was the black tobacco he used to spit. I could see the tobacco as it rolled around in his mouth and stuck to the front of his slightly tarnished teeth, and then he hocked it into a can and passed it to me for my gum. If you looked up the definition of daddy’s little girl in Merriam Webster’s Dictionary you would see my name there sitting in the list of synonyms. Daphne alluded to men being independently strong and well rooted in her example, “I Saw in Louisiana a Live-Oak Growing” by Walt Whitman. My dad epitomized the Live-Oak tree, as a mechanic by trade I saw him hoist engine blocks over his head, to me you may as well said he can leap tall buildings in a single bound. He never seemed to grow old, never seemed to grow tired or weak. Rooted by his faith and admiration for God, he truly was “the master of his environment.” “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock,” by T.S Eliot, Daphne presented a much more fragile man, an insecure unworthy fool of sorts. Now my Dad is no punk but certain life experiences can break a man down to make him feel meek, humble, and small. I experienced this with him only once. I was on vacation with my future husband in Jamaica living life to it’s fullest. Somehow the sun there seemed brighter, the breeze seemed swifter, and the...

Cited: James, Missy, and Alan Merickel. "Perception on Men." 2013. Reading Literature and Writing Argument. 5th ed. Upper Saddle River, NJ: Prentice Hall, 2002. 45-46. Print.
James, Missy, and Alan Merickel. "I Saw in Louisiana a Live-Oak Growing." 2013. Reading Literature and Writing Argument. 5th ed. Upper Saddle River, NJ: Prentice Hall, 2002. 208-210. Print
James, Missy, and Alan Merickel. "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prurfrock." 2013. Reading Literature and Writing Argument. 5th ed. Upper Saddle River, NJ: Prentice Hall, 2002. 188-192. Print
"Sanction." Merriam-Webster. Merriam-Webster, n.d. Web. 17 August 2014. .
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