Personal Narrative: Child Abuse Victim
How many times had I seen myself in the bathroom of his house, all curled up, feeling his hot saliva on my body as he screamed? Stop crying like a baby. You are crazy. No one else could take you.
How many times did I shiver there on the floor, counting my breaths, almost suffocating in a panic attack caused by one of these madness hits? But he never hit me.
How many hours did I stay there on the floor of that bathroom after he had gone back to bed, my red eyes from the vases bursting?
How many times had I heard the snore and realized that he had fallen asleep not more than a meter away while I hyperventilated, still at the mercy of the panic attack? How many times did I whisper, "How did I get here? How did I become this woman? "
How many times …show more content…
I used to think I was crazy or too sensitive because I could not reconcile love with abuse.
I allowed myself to accept that both existed. Their stories allowed me to forgive myself. Recognize how arbitrary the border was. Recognizing myself in her eyes made it possible to name the person who abused me. Name my abuse victim experience. And set me free.
I hope my words will embrace other women. I hope they give them the strength and love they need to get out of the depths.
I noticed when you complained about how boring the hospital is while I was recovering from having our first child and pushed me to rush us home, and how you discounted all my pain and discomfort during my second pregnancy even while I was working 6 days a week at our business and taking care of a four year old.
I noticed how you never helped me in our business, even as you yelled and raged at me for how poorly things were being run
I noticed how you never helped me in our business, even as you yelled and raged at me for how poorly things were being run (in your opinion) and how I needed to do more at the shop. I noticed how even when you committed to doing something, I ended up being the one to take care of it. And I noticed how you took and took and took money without contributing at all. To the extent that we ended up having to close the doors. I noticed how you blamed me for that
How many times did I shiver there on the floor, counting my breaths, almost suffocating in a panic attack caused by one of these madness hits? But he never hit me.
How many hours did I stay there on the floor of that bathroom after he had gone back to bed, my red eyes from the vases bursting?
How many times had I heard the snore and realized that he had fallen asleep not more than a meter away while I hyperventilated, still at the mercy of the panic attack? How many times did I whisper, "How did I get here? How did I become this woman? "
How many times …show more content…
I used to think I was crazy or too sensitive because I could not reconcile love with abuse.
I allowed myself to accept that both existed. Their stories allowed me to forgive myself. Recognize how arbitrary the border was. Recognizing myself in her eyes made it possible to name the person who abused me. Name my abuse victim experience. And set me free.
I hope my words will embrace other women. I hope they give them the strength and love they need to get out of the depths.
I noticed when you complained about how boring the hospital is while I was recovering from having our first child and pushed me to rush us home, and how you discounted all my pain and discomfort during my second pregnancy even while I was working 6 days a week at our business and taking care of a four year old.
I noticed how you never helped me in our business, even as you yelled and raged at me for how poorly things were being run
I noticed how you never helped me in our business, even as you yelled and raged at me for how poorly things were being run (in your opinion) and how I needed to do more at the shop. I noticed how even when you committed to doing something, I ended up being the one to take care of it. And I noticed how you took and took and took money without contributing at all. To the extent that we ended up having to close the doors. I noticed how you blamed me for that