Personal Narrative: Am I Good Enough?
Doubt. Am I good enough?
Aaron takes three lessons a week for $80 an hour… I sit for hours in my room playing until I get it right. My cello was worth $200… Mackenzie’s cello was worth $4,000. Haeun started when she was three… I started when I was 12. These were thoughts crossing my mind when Siess announced the ensemble for state. Yes, I was elated to be one of the three cellists in Camera De Unione, but I doubted my ability to play at state level.
When I found out I was a part of Camera De Unione I practiced whenever feasible. Nothing else was nearly as important as getting the eloquent phrasing and fierce dynamics. After all it was not an everyday piece it was “Tema Russo” By Tchaikovsky, a renown piece that not only gave me goosebumps …show more content…
Siess never spoke directly to me about our inconsistency at Section B of the piece but I took his words personally. I was plagued from the very beginning by this section. I could not understand if it was my lack of experience, improper teaching, or cheap instrument that held me back. I just made it my priority to practice until it was perfect. This is exactly what I did, I put my entire being into memorizing and perfecting that section. By the time state arrived I knew the piece like the back of my hand.
Our final rehearsal was in a cramped rehearsal room at Central Washington University. We sat scrambled around in the room playing the piece from memory. I relished in the moment as we played our hearts out. I looked around to my fellow musicians, I received no glances from Haeun, no awkward frowns from Siess, no indication that i was holding us back, and for once I felt as if I …show more content…
All eyes were on us. Our eyes were on Haeun. Haeun executed an effortless cue that we immediately followed.
I lost track of time and space as we performed. Tema Russo had become what we lived and breathed.Our performance grasped the attention of anyone who could hear because we did not just play the notes, we delivered an emotive declaration through Tchaikovsky’s composition. After all the fear and anxiety I couldn’t believe I was actually playing this piece. When we finished you could feel the energy we had just unleashed upon the crowd.
When we received the first place trophy that night it proved what I am capable of. It took a little old trophy to help me see the strength within myself...I AM good
Aaron takes three lessons a week for $80 an hour… I sit for hours in my room playing until I get it right. My cello was worth $200… Mackenzie’s cello was worth $4,000. Haeun started when she was three… I started when I was 12. These were thoughts crossing my mind when Siess announced the ensemble for state. Yes, I was elated to be one of the three cellists in Camera De Unione, but I doubted my ability to play at state level.
When I found out I was a part of Camera De Unione I practiced whenever feasible. Nothing else was nearly as important as getting the eloquent phrasing and fierce dynamics. After all it was not an everyday piece it was “Tema Russo” By Tchaikovsky, a renown piece that not only gave me goosebumps …show more content…
Siess never spoke directly to me about our inconsistency at Section B of the piece but I took his words personally. I was plagued from the very beginning by this section. I could not understand if it was my lack of experience, improper teaching, or cheap instrument that held me back. I just made it my priority to practice until it was perfect. This is exactly what I did, I put my entire being into memorizing and perfecting that section. By the time state arrived I knew the piece like the back of my hand.
Our final rehearsal was in a cramped rehearsal room at Central Washington University. We sat scrambled around in the room playing the piece from memory. I relished in the moment as we played our hearts out. I looked around to my fellow musicians, I received no glances from Haeun, no awkward frowns from Siess, no indication that i was holding us back, and for once I felt as if I …show more content…
All eyes were on us. Our eyes were on Haeun. Haeun executed an effortless cue that we immediately followed.
I lost track of time and space as we performed. Tema Russo had become what we lived and breathed.Our performance grasped the attention of anyone who could hear because we did not just play the notes, we delivered an emotive declaration through Tchaikovsky’s composition. After all the fear and anxiety I couldn’t believe I was actually playing this piece. When we finished you could feel the energy we had just unleashed upon the crowd.
When we received the first place trophy that night it proved what I am capable of. It took a little old trophy to help me see the strength within myself...I AM good