PATRINA ESSAY
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Smarthinking's E-structor Response Form
(Your marked-up essay is below this form.)
HOW THIS WORKS: Your e-structor has written overview comments about your essay in the form below. Your e-structor has also embedded comments [in bold and in brackets] throughout your essay. Thank you for choosing Smarthinking's OWL; best wishes with revising your paper!
Hi, Patrina! I am Esperanza C., your E-structor for this session. I am happy to be working with you on your writing assignment about your EI test result. Please find below comments and suggestion that will help you further strengthen your assignment. J
*Strengths of the essay: Patrina, the first sentence of your composition reveals the main idea:
“My Emtionial Intelligence test was sixty pecent out of a hundred, which I thought wasnt bad at all,…”
It is evident that rest of the discussions revolves around this topic. Well done. J
Organization:
Patrina, unless you have been instructed to write a single paragraph, I suggest that you break up your essay into several paragraphs. You have compressed too many topics in just one paragraph; breaking it up would show paragraphs that are more focused, which will also help the reader follow the flow of discussion more easily.
One probable way to organize your ideas is to devote one paragraph for each question. For example, you could start off with a paragraph that explains the test you took, its results, and your reaction to it. The subsequent paragraphs can address the rest of the questions posted in the assignment description. Not only will this format enable you to achieve an organized essay, it will also ensure that you have answered all the questions in your assignment description. J
For further enlightenment on proper paragraph development, here is a link that I recommend you visit: Developing Powerful Paragraphs
*patrina 6111163 has requested that you respond to the
Smarthinking's E-structor Response Form
(Your marked-up essay is below this form.)
HOW THIS WORKS: Your e-structor has written overview comments about your essay in the form below. Your e-structor has also embedded comments [in bold and in brackets] throughout your essay. Thank you for choosing Smarthinking's OWL; best wishes with revising your paper!
Hi, Patrina! I am Esperanza C., your E-structor for this session. I am happy to be working with you on your writing assignment about your EI test result. Please find below comments and suggestion that will help you further strengthen your assignment. J
*Strengths of the essay: Patrina, the first sentence of your composition reveals the main idea:
“My Emtionial Intelligence test was sixty pecent out of a hundred, which I thought wasnt bad at all,…”
It is evident that rest of the discussions revolves around this topic. Well done. J
Organization:
Patrina, unless you have been instructed to write a single paragraph, I suggest that you break up your essay into several paragraphs. You have compressed too many topics in just one paragraph; breaking it up would show paragraphs that are more focused, which will also help the reader follow the flow of discussion more easily.
One probable way to organize your ideas is to devote one paragraph for each question. For example, you could start off with a paragraph that explains the test you took, its results, and your reaction to it. The subsequent paragraphs can address the rest of the questions posted in the assignment description. Not only will this format enable you to achieve an organized essay, it will also ensure that you have answered all the questions in your assignment description. J
For further enlightenment on proper paragraph development, here is a link that I recommend you visit: Developing Powerful Paragraphs
*patrina 6111163 has requested that you respond to the