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Mistake That Parents Make

By sumpta18 Nov 01, 2011 999 Words
Illustration Essay: Mistake that parents make
Since the beginning of time, parents have tried to perfect the different parenting styles. Although most parents believe that they have perfected their parenting styles, there are still mistakes that parents make. There are different mistakes parents make when it come down to parenting which they are not aware of; some of these mistakes are due to the fact that they were brought up in the same way, while others are because they never learned about different ways to effectively get through to their children. There are several examples of mistakes parents make, and some of these examples are: having little to no communication with their children, limited interactions with their children, interacting with their children as though they were their friends instead of parents, overly punishing, or not punishing their kids, and allowing themselves to be taken advantage of by their kids are some of the mistakes. First of all communication, a strong and healthy family is built on having great communication amongst the members of the family, communication between members of a family is very important in holding a family together. Parents sometimes neglect the importance of communication in the family; either they are constantly talking without listening, listening without giving any feedback, or simply not communicating effectively at all. The mistake parents make when it comes to communicating is the fact that most parents believe that since they are the adults in the family, they have the right to make decisions on behalf of everybody in the family without talking it through. Some parents also believe that having little to no communication in the family lessens confrontations. Communication is the key, and without effective communication parents wouldn’t be giving their kids enough chance to express themselves, and this can cause the kids to rebel against the parents and the decisions they make. Also with lack of communication parents can often lead their kids down the wrong path, by not advising them on what to do and what not to do. Secondly, another mistake parents make, is having limited to no interactions with their children when it’s needed. Being that in today’s society both the mother and father has to work in order to provide the family with necessary needs; it becomes very easy for parents to ignore spending necessary time with their kids. It is very crucial that parents spend as much needed time as possible with their kids, because it gives both parent and the child a chance to get to know each other and bond. Most families today have conflicts because of the fact that neither parent nor child understands each other; with both the parents and the children’s busy schedule family time becomes the least important thing in on their schedule. Being self absorbed on the parent’s part plays another big role, most parents are so into themselves that they neglect and ignore their children’s needs and the kids are forced to raise themselves. Usually parents whom are self absorbed fail to recognize the fact that, they are ignoring their child’s needs because in their minds they feel they are doing all the necessary things. Parents also make the mistake of treating their kids as though they were their friends or best friends. For example parents who had their first child at a very young age usually fall into the path of raising their kids as their friends, because they are close in age it becomes very hard for that parent to raise them without trying to so hard to relate to them, that their kids start seeing them more as friends than actual parents. Parents who make this mistake also make the mistake of letting their kids take advantage of them, for example parents that give their children way too much leisure time without actually balancing it out, is at risk of being taken advantage of by their children. Especially parents who were brought up the same way, they feel the need to please the kid and thinking its ok by letting their kids do as they please. A lot of parents tend to make this mistake because they want to pamper and make their kids feel special, without realizing that what they are actually doing is a recipe for disaster. When a child has control over the parent or has the ability to take advantage of the parent, it becomes harder for that child to do what the parent asks for, without there being a conflict between the parent and child. Lastly, another mistake that parents make is overly punishing their children or not effectively punishing their children. Just like the saying “spare the rod and spoil the child”, some parents tend to go overboard, while some spare the rod and do in fact spoil the child. For example a parent who constantly punishes their child for every little silly mistake he or she makes, might think their technique of discipline is right. Psychology study has shown that parent who tend to overly punish their children, instead of having an obedient child end up with a rebellious child or a child who ends up being scared of them. Parents often make this mistake because they don’t realize the thin line between punishing a child effectively and child abuse; because they feel they are doing it right. When it comes to punishments, some parents have no eye for effective punishment, and these are the parents that just yell and yell until they completely lose their voice. These parents believe that punishing their kids will lead to the kids being distant from them, and because they fear this, they rather their kids go unpunished than lose them to any circumstances whatsoever. Whether its punishments, communication, interaction, or boundaries, there are a lot of mistakes that parent make that they refuse to agree to. So when it comes down to parenting, parents are prone to making lots of mistakes.

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