Kindred Identity Analysis
Hi Brianna,
I 'm Benjamin, your tutor for this draft of your essay. I understand that you wanted some help with content and grammar, but there are other revisions you can make that will have a greater impact on your paper that we need to take care of first.
Essay Summary
This essay examines how issues of identity were influenced by language, appearance, and mannerisms in Kindred.
Strengths of the Essay
You have a great deal of discussion backed up by solid examples and evidence throughout your paper, Brianna. This makes your observations and claims very persuasive. Nice work.
Introduction/Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion both give equal focus to Dana and Kevin, but the rest of your paper focuses on Dana almost exclusively. …show more content…
[All this focus on Dana should be reflected in your introduction and conclusion. Otherwise, your reader will be distracted by continually wondering when you are going to discuss Kevin in similar depth.] She had to learn how to be obedient, submissive, and take orders from others effortlessly which is not what she was used to in the 19th century. If she hadn’t adapted to the mannerisms of a slave she would be seen as a threat to the white people and this would have put her life in danger. “Rufus’s time demanded things of me that had never been demanded before it could easily kill me if I did not meet its demands “ ( Butler, 191) Even the slightest form of disrespect could get her in trouble “At first I stared back. Then I looked away, remembering that I was supposed to be a slave. Slaves lowered their eyes respectfully. To stare back was insolent” (Butler, 66). It had happened to many slaves “Once I was called over to the slaves cabins – the quarter – to watch Wyelin punish a field hand for the crime of answering back” (Butler, 92). Some advice Luke gave to Nigel was “Don’t argue with white folks, “He had said. “Don’t tell them ‘no’. Don’t let them see you mad. Just say ‘Yes sir’.” (Butler, 96). Even the way that she addressed white people had to change “No doubt I was supposed to give him some title of respect. But “Master”? “You have to say it, “he insisted.”Or ‘Young Master’ or… or Mister’... “You’ll get in trouble if you don’t, if daddy hears you. (Butler, 30) Dana had to completely change as a person, and she did so very well. So well however, that is bothered her a great deal “Kevin and I became more a part of the household, familiar, accepted, accepting. That disturbed me too when I thought about it. How easily we seemed to acclimatize” (Butler, 97). Though
I 'm Benjamin, your tutor for this draft of your essay. I understand that you wanted some help with content and grammar, but there are other revisions you can make that will have a greater impact on your paper that we need to take care of first.
Essay Summary
This essay examines how issues of identity were influenced by language, appearance, and mannerisms in Kindred.
Strengths of the Essay
You have a great deal of discussion backed up by solid examples and evidence throughout your paper, Brianna. This makes your observations and claims very persuasive. Nice work.
Introduction/Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion both give equal focus to Dana and Kevin, but the rest of your paper focuses on Dana almost exclusively. …show more content…
[All this focus on Dana should be reflected in your introduction and conclusion. Otherwise, your reader will be distracted by continually wondering when you are going to discuss Kevin in similar depth.] She had to learn how to be obedient, submissive, and take orders from others effortlessly which is not what she was used to in the 19th century. If she hadn’t adapted to the mannerisms of a slave she would be seen as a threat to the white people and this would have put her life in danger. “Rufus’s time demanded things of me that had never been demanded before it could easily kill me if I did not meet its demands “ ( Butler, 191) Even the slightest form of disrespect could get her in trouble “At first I stared back. Then I looked away, remembering that I was supposed to be a slave. Slaves lowered their eyes respectfully. To stare back was insolent” (Butler, 66). It had happened to many slaves “Once I was called over to the slaves cabins – the quarter – to watch Wyelin punish a field hand for the crime of answering back” (Butler, 92). Some advice Luke gave to Nigel was “Don’t argue with white folks, “He had said. “Don’t tell them ‘no’. Don’t let them see you mad. Just say ‘Yes sir’.” (Butler, 96). Even the way that she addressed white people had to change “No doubt I was supposed to give him some title of respect. But “Master”? “You have to say it, “he insisted.”Or ‘Young Master’ or… or Mister’... “You’ll get in trouble if you don’t, if daddy hears you. (Butler, 30) Dana had to completely change as a person, and she did so very well. So well however, that is bothered her a great deal “Kevin and I became more a part of the household, familiar, accepted, accepting. That disturbed me too when I thought about it. How easily we seemed to acclimatize” (Butler, 97). Though