The NY Times called America a “post-marital society.” Tragically, that seems to be accurate.
I say tragically because marriage is good. It’s good for your spiritual health, your mental health, your physical health, your fiscal health, your sexual life. In short, it’s good all around.
In fact, a classic book by Peggy Waite and Maggie Gallagher, The Case for Marriage, documents all these things. They even show that people who are married live longer and happier.
So why has marriage hit such hard times in our society?
“Marriage is a wonderful institution,” said Mae West famously. “But who wants to live in an institution?”
I read a release from National Marriage Week USA that in 1970, 79% of adults were married, but only 57% were married in 2008. Some 40% of children are now born in America out of wedlock. In the black community, 72% of children are born without married parents. Indeed, marriage has fallen on hard times in our day.
I believe that ultimately marriage is a spiritual picture. When tens of millions of viewers all around the world saw William and Kate tie the knot at Westminster Abbey in London several weeks back, they heard some of the Church officials mention the traditional belief that marriage is a picture of Christ and His bride-the Church. That’s why marriage is so special.
Perhaps, that’s why marriage is under attack in America-seemingly from all quarters, such as:
• No-fault divorce laws which make it easy to get divorced, even if only one wants out. Imagine trying to do business with someone, where the other person can simply opt out when he/she feels like it;
• People living together before they get married (if they get married). Surveys have shown that cohabitation generally better prepares a couple for divorce more than for a happy marriage;
• The feminist assault. One of the leaders said (long before she herself got married) that a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle;
• The gay attempt to redefine marriage.
Many today think marriage is unnecessary. They think marriage is misery and singleness is bliss. Monogamy sounds like with monotony. It’s boring, supposedly. Who wants to be confined to just one spouse?
Modern Western man may condemn the primitive cultures which practice polygamy. But we have “serial polygamy,” one wife (or girlfriend) after another. I think one of the biggest myths of all about marriage is that all that matters are feelings. But feelings come and go.
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