Letter of Advice to Nicolas Thomas and Kelsey Blanc
COM200: Interpersonal Communication
Instructor Lindsey Hallead
Letter of Advice to Nicolas and Kelsey
Dear Nicholas and Kelsey
COM200: Interpersonal Communications
Instructor Lindsey Hallead
March 25, 2013
Dear Nicholas and Kelsey,
I would like to start by saying congratulations on the engagement. Marriage is an important step; a commitment shared between two people, whom love one another. When preparing for marriage, you and your partner must have good interpersonal communication, first. Having good interpersonal communication allow you, both, to interact better with one another and improve your listening skills. I am excited that you, two, have decided to get advice before taking the next step in your life. The advice presented to you will help you, Nicolas and Kelsey, have a healthy marriage. There are five steps that will help you (1) improve your communication toward one another and become better listeners, which will allow you two to understand one another, (2) become aware of your partner’s emotional state and needs, (3) know what to say and how to say it without upsetting one another or making the situation worst, and (4) become comfortable with your partner to express self-disclosure, and (5) become familiar with your partner’s culture, if you two share a different one.
Body Paragraph #1- Develop strategies for active, critical, and empathic listening. Everyone wants to be heard, but some never like to listen. Nicholas and Kelsey, you two, must be able to listen as the other speaks, and vice versa. You must never ignore one another. Listen as the other speaks and reply once it is your turn. Never interrupt the one that is speaking. This would cause a problem, as if you did not care about your partner’s conversation. “What does it take to have a happy marriage? Film Director Tracie Donahue says, “Being good friends is important, having realistic expectations of marriage is key, and learning skills to communicate through Marriage Education is imperative,” (PR Newswire, 2009). Communication is the key to having a healthy marriage. When communicating with one another, it is important that you are focused and listening while the other speaks. Do not be afraid to ask questions if something is not clear to you. Adair identified effective listening is a process that requires six distinct components: (1) motivating yourself to listen, (2) clearly hearing the message, (3) paying attention to the message, (4) correctly interpreting the message, (5) evaluating the message, and (6) remembering and responding appropriately (as cited in Sole, 2011, sec 7.3). It is necessary to communicate with one another on a daily basis, to stay connected; not communicating with one another on a daily basis can cause tension to your relationship.
Body Paragraph #2- Define emotional intelligence and its role in effective interpersonal relationships To have a healthy marriage, you must be able to understand your partner and what one another is feeling. Do not feel ashamed, when expressing your emotions, doing this allows your partner to understand you or what is troubling you. “Your capacity to understand, communicate, and manage emotions and feelings, as well as your ability to understand and respond to the feelings of others, indicate your level of emotional intelligence,” (Sole, 2011, 9.2). If your partner is feeling down, ask them what is bothering them. Ask him/her is there anything you can do to make it better. Do not be afraid to reach out to your partner. He/she may need a hug or need you, and may just be waiting on you to ask them what is wrong. Asking your partner questions, about their feelings, shows that you care and are interested in what is going on. I can related to this, because I sometimes, use to feel like that. There are days when I was silent and did not know how to express...
References: KANSAS STATE UNIVERSITY: Family studies professor offer tips on building healthy marriages. (1997, Dec 18). M2 Presswire, pp. 1. Retrieved from http://search.proquest.com.proxy-library.ashford.edu/docview/446311121?accountid-32521
The “Secrets to Love” Documentary is Out, Says California Healthy Marriages Coalition. (2009, Feb 03). PR Newswire. Retrieved from http://sarch.proquest.com/docview/450566087?accountid=32521
Sole, K. ((2011). Making Connections: Understanding Interpersonal Communication. Bridgepoint Education, Inc.
Wood, J. (1995). Gendered lives: communication, gender, & culture. Canadian Journal of Communication. Retrieved from http://search.proquest.com.proxy-library.ashford.edu/docview/2195607437
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