Ice Skating Determination

I used to believe the best way to avoid failure was to quit. Giving up before falling short meant never having to worry about losing or appearing incompetent. By insisting it was not worth my time to try, I could dissociate from my failures and blame them on my lack of interest or the activity’s low level of importance. This mindset went unchallenged throughout elementary and middle school when many of my chosen pastimes required minimal skill. It was not until high school that I began to feel uneasy about my lack of effort.
The pattern of quitting began at a young age. Second grade was the first time I can remember giving up an activity I truly enjoyed. For several months, I took ice skating lessons before inviting my friend Shannon to join me for a day. She loved it and had talent, consequently gliding past my skill level with ease in her first few weeks of practice. In response to her success, I decided ice skating was not my sport. I discontinued practicing almost immediately.
First, it was ice skating. Then it was gymnastics. Soon, it was Quizbowl and Science Olympiad. My choice of sports and extracurricular activities went out the window as I decided that if I was not excellent from the start, it was not worth trying at all.
In tenth grade, when my afternoons were empty, I became afraid of my past actions. I had given up on activities that I once loved, leaving me bored, alone, and envious of friends that had full schedules and seemingly endless passions to discuss. That was when I realized that I had never quit for the right reasons. I quit because it was too hard. I quit because I was lazy and unwilling to work for success. This haunted me for the rest of the year. I had thought of myself as successful, but I had failed time and time again without acknowledging my