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Haya (respect)

By mimi819 Nov 29, 2013 1552 Words
Arabic 102
May, 24, 2012

Hayaa (Western Vs. Eastern)
“Hayaa” originate from the word Hayat meaning life. The significances of the word Hayaa is unable to be translated in just one word in the English language; translation of Haya is shy, modesty, and the fear of Allah. Islamically, Hayaa has a substantial aspect which helps guide one to avoid anything offensive or horrendous. When an individual obtains Hayaa it causes one to feel embarrassment behalf of a wrongdoing; one would have shame and modesty in their heart. The reason being, that one will have displeased Allah by breaking a commitment. Hayaa partakes huge role in the lives of Muslims because; it is a very important part of one’s Iman. For anyone who doesn’t have any form on Hayaa it stated one’s Iman is very weak. Narrated by Abu Huraira (ra): The Prophet said, "Faith (Belief) consists of more than sixty branches (i.e. parts). And Hayaa is a part of faith." (Bukhari)

Traveling outside of western part of the world one see a drastic change in human behavior. Western part of the world demonstrates an example of NO HAYAA. In America, it’s socially acceptable to disrespect ones parents, teachers and elder with little to no punishment for one’s behavior. Furthermore, young adolescent has the ascendancy to believe that they can neglect their parents after the age of 18. Not taking into consideration that their parents are the ones who provided supported, and cared for them for all 18 years. Westerns easily forget the sacrifices that their parents have made for them. They forget to such an extent where they believe that putting their parents in nursing homes is beneficial for them and have performed their duty. Outrageously, statistics show 1.4 million people are currently living in a U.S nursing home. 20,673 have complaint of being abuses, gross neglect and exploitation on behalf of nursing home.

In contrast, western part of the world it’s completely unacceptable. Eastern part of the world has profusely fixated on Hayaa as a religious barrier and also cultural one. In Islam, an elder is obligated to be respected. Grey haired people have been specially indicated as objects of our respect in Hadith. Hadhrat Abu Musa Ashari (Radi Allah Anho) relates that the Holy Prophet, Hadhrat Muhammad-ur Rasulullaah (Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam), said, “for a grey haired Muslim is a part of respect for Allah.”. However, respect is not limited to just one who has grey hair. Unlike the to the western society, in the eastern society children are honored to take care of their parents until death. It’s clearly stated that the gates to Jannah lies under the mothers feet and the key to the gate is the father. The care and love that portrays within a parent and child is indescribable. The sacrifice that a parent does for a child is should be genuinely appreciated and not just taken for granted. Parent having sleepiness nights due to their child’s restlessness, breast feeding to tame their child’s hungry, maintain their cleanliness, and also trying to grant their child’s every wish. Just as a child has a right over their parent when they are at helpless, dependent age, one’s parent has a right over their child when they’re just as fragile. Children responsibility is to take care of their parents. There comes a time in one’s life where the parents yearn for love and time to spend with their child. Hoping that’s their children will in return show them the tenderness and affection that they one gave to them.

I would like to contribute a story that greatly toughed my heart and shows why Hayaa is so significance.
My mom only had one eye. I hated her... she was such an embarrassment. My mom ran a small shop at a flea market. She collected little weeds and such to sell... anything for the money we needed she was such an embarrassment. There was this one day during elementary school.I remember that it was field day, and my mom came. I was so embarrassed.How could she do this to me? I threw her a hateful look and ran out. The next day at school..."Your mom only has one eye?!" and they taunted me.I wished that my mom would just disappear from this world so I said to my mom, "Mom, why don't you have the other eye?! You're only going to make me a laughingstock. Why don't you just die?" My mom did not respond. I guess I felt a little bad, but at the same time, it felt good to think that I had said what I'd wanted to say all this time.Maybe it was because my mom hadn't punished me, but I didn't think that I had hurt her feelings very badly.That night...I woke up, and went to the kitchen to get a glass of water. My mom was crying there, so quietly, as if she was afraid that she might wake me. I took a look at her, and then turned away. Because of the thing I had said to her earlier, there was something pinching at me in the corner of my heart. Even so, I hated my mother who was crying out of her one eye. So I told myself that I would grow up and become successful, because I hated my one-eyed mom and our desperate poverty.Then I studied really hard. I left my mother and came to Seoul and studied, and got accepted in the Seoul University with all the confidence I had. Then, I got married. I bought a house of my own. Then I had kids, too. Now I'm living happily as a successful man. I like it here because it's a place that doesn't remind me of my mom. This happiness was getting bigger and bigger, when someone unexpected came to see me "What?! Who's this?!" ...It was my mother...Still with her one eye. It felt as if the whole sky was falling apart on me. My little girl ran away, scared of my mom's eye. And I asked her, "Who are you? I don't know you!!!" as if I tried to make that real. I screamed at her "How dare you come to my house and scare my daughter! GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!!!" And to this, my mother quietly answered, "oh, I'm so sorry. I may have gotten the wrong address," and she disappeared. Thank good ness... she doesn't recognize me. I was quite relieved. I told myself that I wasn't going to care, or think about this for the rest of my life.Then a wave of relief came upon day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house. I lied to my wife saying that I was going on a business trip. After the reunion, I went down to the old shack, that I used to call a house...just out of curiosity there, I found my mother fallen on the cold ground. But I did not shed a single tear. She had a piece of paper in her hand.... it was a letter to me. She wrote:My son...

I think my life has been long enough now. And... I won't visit Seoul anymore... but would it be too much to ask if I wanted you to come visit me once in a while? I miss you so much. And I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion. But I decided not to go to the school.... For you... I'm sorry that I only have one eye, and I was an embarrassment for you. You see, when you were very little, you got into an accident, and lost your eye. As a mother, I couldn't stand watching you having to grow up with only one eye... so I gave you mine...I was so proud of my son that was seeing a whole new world for me, in my place, with that eye. I was never upset at you for anything you did. The couple times that you were angry with me. I thought to myself, 'it's because he loves me.' I miss the times when you were still young around me.I miss you so much. I love you. You mean the world to me.My world shattered!!! Then I cried for the the person who lived for me... MY MOTHER

Inclusion, Hayaa is a crucial part of Islam and plays a momentous role in a Muslims life, it secures elders from being abandoned and neglected. The presents of Hayaa is greatly influential that it guides one to the right path, and gives one a conscience to modestly accomplish their job that is counted upon them. Insha’Allah, may Allah give us the Hayaa to perform our righteous duty as Muslim.

"Haya (Shyness)." Haya (Shyness). Web. 24 May 2012. .
"Parents Sacrifice for Children, Noble Qur'an and Muslim Parents, Boy and Apple Tree, A Mother's Sacrifice (Very Touching Story)." Parents Sacrifice for Children, Noble Qur'an and Muslim Parents, Boy and Apple Tree, A Mother's Sacrifice (Very Touching Story). Web. 24 May 2012. . "Nursing Home Statistics ." Nursing Home Statistics. Web. 24 May 2012. . "|-| Islamic Studies |-|." |-| Islamic Studies |-|. Web. 24 May 2012. .

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