After dating one dud after another, you finally find someone who seems to have it all thoughtful, witty, responsible and good-looking to boot. Then they drop a bomb: “I used to be a drug addict.” They may as well have said, “I’m married.” But does one partner being in recovery automatically spell doom for a relationship?
Healthy Recovery, Healthy Relationships
Most recovering addicts aren’t strangers to therapy and, as a result, have spent a lot of time working on themselves and their relationships. They have learned critical relationship skills, including how to identify process and communicate their emotions and to set personal boundaries while respecting the lines drawn by others. Recovering addicts don’t expect perfection in their partners, having learned firsthand that it doesn’t exist. And they have committed in recovery and in life to honesty and integrity and making decisions in accordance with their values.
Men and women learn a lot in recovery, not just about staying sober but living a happy, satisfying life. They don’t need to be taken care of; they learned how to do that for themselves. Some are deeply spiritual people whose lives are infused with meaning and purpose, while others volunteer in their communities or have interesting hobbies that keep them grounded. Because recovery is a lifelong process, recovering addicts are in a perpetual state of self-improvement.
Bottom of Form
Despite having a thorny past, recovering addicts can be some of the healthiest, most put-together individuals you’ll meet with a few important stipulations. First, the recovering addict should have at least one year of sobriety, and preferably many more. Second, they should be actively working a program of recovery, attending meetings, volunteering, and practicing self-care and so on, not just begrudgingly staying away from drugs and alcohol while addictive patterns fester. These provisos are in place to give