Cultural Differences Between Sula And Nel

Responding to a scolding from Eva concerning marriage and children, Sula declares, "I don't want to make somebody else. I want to make myself,"—a statement which illustrates her desire to generate her own identity and control her own life (Morrison, 92). When Sula and her friend Nel were young, they were “in [the] safe harbor of each other's company [where] they could afford to abandon the ways of other people and concentrate on their own perceptions of things”, an attitude which Sula maintains into adulthood (Morrison, 55). While Nel steps back into the line of conformity as they age, Sula surges forward, acting according to her own ideas of the world. This mentality causes many problems for Sula throughout her life, problems that she accepts
Most sociologists agree that “the differences in roles and behaviors of men and women are social and cultural in origin,” ( Wisemen, 7) and while Sula and Nel both grew up in the Bottom, they were raised in very different types of American
Nel on the other hand, is raised in the more traditional family dynamic, where a husband and children are of upmost importance. The divergence in Nel and Sula’s relationship is directly related to the diverging values in American culture, where some families began to adapt progressively with the new freedoms allowed to women, and where some clung to the traditional Victorian Era like ideals that were beginning to crumble. While it may seem wrong what Sula did, she was raised that such behavior is normal, and under the—perhaps misguided—illusion that Nel should value their friendship above any man. Sula remains true to herself, even when Nel confronts her on her death bed—when Sula has absolutely nothing and no one—and asks what these life decisions have given her. Sula replies “Girl, I got my mind. And what goes on in it. Which is to say, I got me” (Morrison, 143). In Sula’s dying thought it is shown truly how much she cares for her friend and their friendship, which further illustrates how much she gave up in order to remain independent and devoted to her