Chinese dream and my dream

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Chinese dream and my dream
“There would be no new China without the Communist Party”, I’ve heard of this saying since I was a little child. From then on, the Communist Party has left a deep and giant impression on me. China makes great progress under the leadership of the Communist Party which has always been the belief of China. I’ve been told that it would be a great honor to be a party member. So now I am a party member and the Chinese belief becomes my genuine belief.
However, as growing up, I begin to wonder whether all the party members can regard the Communist party as their belief all the time and whether they are doing the things the party member should do. The answer is so disappointed. The power of Chinese belief and the awareness of Chinese people of supporting the belief are becoming weaker and weaker.
China needs a firm and strong advocate of the belief.
Many people can establish the belief of becoming a party member, but they can’t follow their original belief all the lifetime. Gradually they lose themselves in the debauchery lives and they forget what they have said under the flag. Other people without party affiliation are harder to see their own belief clearly. A nation without definite belief is lamentable and horrible because it can be easily destroyed by the outside rumor.
Chinese dream of need a power to hold the belief is the same as my dream. We are facing the similar situation. It is easy for me to set up a goal, but I can’t carry out the goal from beginning to end. Sometimes the obstacles or the outside environment make me give up the goal. I lack the perseverance. I lack the power to hold the goal. I’ m a member of the Communist Party, but I’m not true of the name for the reason I’ve mentioned above. After many years, I’ m afraid of becoming the kind of person I disliked before. I’ m afraid of losing myself in the busy world. I’ m afraid of forget all the dream and belief made when I was young.
I really need the power to help me

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