Characteristics of a Healthy Marriage

Randy Van Dusen

Professor Crow

English 40

26 June 2010

Characteristics of a Healthy Marriage

A marriage can be described as a common characteristic used to make a couple live a happy marriage. Communication is a key role in a marriage. It creates a strong trustworthy bond between them. Respect is determined by decisions made by a spouse. It helps make a safe relationship. Trust helps a couple be smart with their thoughts and feelings throughout a marriage. Healthy marriages consist of three characteristics: communication, respect, and trust. The first and most important characteristic of marriage is communication. In order to have a healthy marriage, the couple has to be able communicate with each other. It creates a strong trustworthy bond between them. As a child, I remember a time when my Dad was on travel for work. He would always call my Mom and talk with her about what he had done that day. I would pick up the phone and listen to what the two had to say. My Mom caught me a couple of times because I was breathing too hard. The one thing I remember hearing was “I love you”. That was the best experience of my life. On some occasions, my Mom would be too busy at work and could not be home to answer the phone. He would leave messages on the answering machine. One day, I saw my Mom’s eyes light up when he walked through the door. They would surprise me sometimes by not telling me that he is on his way home. Their ability to communicate with each other is amazing. They keep in touch with each other which strengthens their bond even though they are not physically together. A marriage cannot always be perfect, as being separated by work can create a void between the two, but communication has helped to keep my Mom and Dad’s marriage healthy, happy and strong. The respect that a spouse gives to each other influences how children act on a daily base. When the parent loves and care for each other, the children then learns how to mature in life. Many people think that not having respect for each other would create a struggle or conflict with one another. The first time I saw my Mom come towards me and ask. “Can you please help me do the laundry?” and of course being nice I helped her do it. Respecting each other will create a strong relationship. If I have decided to leave it dirty she would be upset and mad at me. When spouses do not have respect for one another they run into problems like not listening to each other’s opinions. One example of this would be. A husband decides not to go watch a movie with his wife. That would create a conflict between them. But listening to each other’s opinion makes the marriage a lot simpler. So having respect in a relationship can lead to a happy marriage, or it can also lead to a painful relationship. Trust is the last characteristic that I think makes up a marriage. It helps create a safe relationship between the couple. Trust is a certainly a requirement for any marriage. We can only trust each other with our feelings so that we can share them with others. In order to create trust the parent has to find out a way to escape the bad things and determine how the good things can be created into a bond. One way is talking with each other. All the thoughts and feelings in a person’s head are all trustworthy to anyone. Not telling anyone these thoughts will create a bond that cannot be resolved. I had experienced trust when I was ten years old. I was asked to come to a party. But then my Dad would not let me go because he would not trust me. So creating this trustworthy bond takes courage and determination. Not everyone will have trust, but if they do then it makes a marriage successful. I believe that a strong healthy marriage consist of these characteristics that make a marriage successful. Not every marriage is perfect. They can lead to many struggles in life. To achieve a successful marriage always communicate, respect, and trust everyone. Healthy marriages consist of many characteristics that all can change throughout life. But the common characteristic is communication. It allows everyone to share their thoughts and feelings when they need it.