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Can We All Just Get Along

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Can We All Just Get Along?
Michelle Powell
COM200: Interpersonal Communication
Lacey Miller
September 5, 2011

Can We All Just Get Along How many times have you heard the phase “Can we all just get along”? Miscommunication happens all the time with spouses, children, parents, teachers and even bosses and co-workers. It is a fact of life that there will be laps of communication in your relationships you have throughout your life. The real test is learning from your mistakes or from mistaken identity in the communication world; to become a better communicator and listener to accomplish the right dialog for the moment or situation at hand. In this paper I will be sharing my thoughts and comments about miscommunication and ways to correct it; commenting on “Close Relationships Sometimes Mask Poor Communication” I will address as well. There have been many instances where a message has gotten across to an individual that should have been interpreted one way, but instead it was heard differently which may have caused strife of some sort and hurt feelings. Or it could have been misinterpreted in such a way that caused both parties involved to begin to laugh uncontrollably over what was said. For instance, I went to the credit union with my mom and the young man behind the counter asked my mom if we were sisters. My mom answered back and I thought I heard her say that I was her mom, but in fact what she had said was “I’m my mom”, she was referring to herself. We laughed so hard afterwards it was hilarious. I was thinking she said I was her mom and she is calling herself her mom; very funny moment in miss communication. Some laps of communication are handled with laughter, while others can be confusing and must be discussed until an understanding can be reached. . Even some siblings can have a great misunderstanding with one another and instead of fixing the problem they lose all form of communication to deal with their issue and pain that it caused. The reading on close relationships sometimes mask poor communication was very interesting. Some couples believe that it is better to communicate with a stranger than it is with their spouse, because they feel that they have been together so long that maybe they have lost the ability to understand what the other is actually feeling or can even identify with that person emotionally. The paper states, “Our problem in communicating with friends and spouses is that we have an illusion of insight. Getting close to someone appears to create the illusion of understanding more than actual understanding (Anonymous, 2011)." I have to say in some instances that may be true; you may feel you know your spouse or friend so well that you continue with that mindset that you have them figured out. However people change and sometimes circumstances change as well, what worked one day might not work the next or maybe it well, but, that is why communication is key if the relationship is to be successful. Our text states (Sole, Section 3.2, 2011), “The ability to regulate what you say and how you act—is related to strong family bonds and low family conflict; empathy, the ability to understand the perspectives of other people; low levels of anger and aggression; and the ability to take responsibility for your failings (2011). The capacity to control your emotions, urges, and desires has also been shown to result in healthier intimate relationships because you are willing and able to sacrifice your own needs, at times, for the benefit of your partner and the relationship (2011). This is why communication is important, because misunderstandings do arise, but, if all parties involved would take the time to talk to each other and work things out the outcome may be surprising. Sometimes changing one’s mindset and how someone would think about themselves also is very influential in the process of communication. A great deal of research in the field of psychology has determined that just as your interpersonal communication with other people affects your view of yourself, the way in which you communicate internally also has an effect on your ability to build positive relationships with other people (Sole, Section 3.2, 2011). It’s most important to allow for an individual to see themselves in a positive way for if they don’t it very well could affect all the relationships around them. Getting to the heart of the matter is important as well, because if there is a problem and it is not addressed properly it can resurface to cause the same negative views that were around before, thus interpersonal relationships can be affected. Overall, to have success in life and the different areas where we have social contact with others, whether on the job, in the classroom and even in the doctor’s office it is important to master in the skill of not only listening but also in learning to communicate efficiently. In disagreements when they occur it is important to learn how to communicate with a level head and not out of anger for that will only cause problems and not get the intended result or outcome expected. After learning from the past of how things went wrong from lack of communication, it is best to move forward and rely on what was learned to effectively know how to communicate efficiently in any given situation. In this paper I have shared my thoughts and views about communication and ways to correct it; commenting on “Close Relationships Sometimes Mask Poor Communication” I address as well.

References Anonymous, . Close Relationships Sometimes Mask Poor Communication. (2011, January). U.S. | News & World Report,1. Retrieved September 5, 2011, from ABI/INFORM Global. (Document ID: 2270370591). Sole, K. (2011).Making connections: Understanding interpersonal communication. San Diego, CA: Bridgepoint Education, Inc. | | | |

References: Anonymous, . Close Relationships Sometimes Mask Poor Communication. (2011, January). U.S. | News & World Report,1.  Retrieved September 5, 2011, from ABI/INFORM Global. (Document ID: 2270370591). Sole, K. (2011).Making connections: Understanding interpersonal communication. San Diego, CA: Bridgepoint Education, Inc. | | | |

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