Broken Family

Topics: Family, Sampling, Marriage Pages: 13 (3631 words) Published: January 20, 2011
Chapter I
Problem and Its Setting

Family is the basic components of the society. And the researcher believes that the number one ingredients on youth’s happy life are their family, that the parents are the most important source of youth’s behavior, which effect to their outlook in life. So if the parents are separated, how does it affect the youth and what can they do about it? When parents split up, there can be many emotions that a youth may have to deal with. These feelings, internalized or expressed, will result in certain behavior that will possibly affect to the youth’s outlook in life. Being a broken hurts! It is the collapse of a God intended design. Children can get robbed of a special experience and protection called "Family". They move on in their lives as individuals without the understanding of what familial security and bond is. They look out into the world and wonder why it has dealt them a cruel card in life. "Why me? Why can't it be Pedro, the big bully? Surely he deserves it more than I do?!" Having to deal with separated parents can sometimes also be much harder than if one were to grieve their loss through death. Some people, however, swing to the opposite end by denying that it affects them. They try to go on merrily in their lives projecting an image that they are handling it well. The truth is, there is a world of difference between what one experiences in a healthy family versus one that is broken. It does not, however, spell condemnation or doom in your life. You can do something about it. The operative word here is "do". This implies that they need to take time to identify the feelings and thoughts that are running through them. To ask all the questions they need to ask, and then allow themselves to grieve through this loss. Only when they know what they feel, can they learn to overcome it, and move on with better strength, positive ness and hope. Healing is necessary. Do not shortchange them.[1] In some instances, youths may feel responsible for their parents separation. This could be due to the fights that the parents may have over them. Sometimes, parents openly declare to them that they are splitting up because of irreconcilable differences on parenting. Other parents may blame the child for their breakup because they may feel that the child has added more stress in their marriage, causing them much emotional tension and loss of time for each other. A loss of family identity often makes one feel inadequate or incomplete. Many youths from broken families often feel inferior to others. Sometimes, people around are ignorant and ask questions like "It's father's day today, where is your dad?" or "How come you are sometimes contacted at this number and other times at another number?” These innocent questions often force the child to face the painful reality of his family situation over and over again. Even the forms that they fill sometimes require them to state their parent's names, addresses, marital status and their relationship to them. Children from broken families often feel rejected. The feeling that one has been abandoned by the two closest people in the world often leaves scars that are difficult to heal. The child is left to try to understand why these two people cannot stay together and may even personalize the blame because they feel that they are not good enough to bring them back together. Research shows that people who come from broken families are twice as much at risk in having failed marriages. Many of us do not realize how much we actually pick up from our own upbringing. We carry them into our lives. We need to watch out for this so that we do not carry over the negative aspects. Or it may just end up as a vicious cycle, from generation to generation.[2]

Background of the Study

The sharp increase of broken family in the country is the reason for the researcher to...
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