A 4-MAT Review System: The Complete Guide to Marriage Mentoring Diane Jaynes
The Complete Guide to Marriage Mentoring by Les & Leslie Parrott, came straight from their hearts. They encourage individuals to become marriage mentors founded on the Word of God (Parrott, 2005). As Christians, we need to wage a war on divorce and empower couples to build rock solid relationships (Parrott, 2005). One of the main things that the authors discuss in this book is The Marriage mentoring Triad. The triad has three important aspects to it and they are as follows: Preparing: Most couples view their wedding as a culmination of a courtship process. But in reality, it is just a beginning. It actually starts a lifelong partnership (Parrott, 2005). Mentors can help engaged and newly married couples cultivate positive habits right from the start, that eill pay off for them may years in the future (Parrott, 2005). This point in the couple’s relationship is a great opportunity for Mentors to help them develop healthy habits that will last forever and prevent a lot of sorrow and pain in the marriage(Parrott, 2005). The objective for marriage is not to avoid conflict. If managed correctly, conflict can assist with constructing resilient marriages (Parrott, 2005). Conflict is the cost smart couples pay for a heightening appreciation of closeness (Parrott, 2005). Maximizing is the aspect in mentoring that assist with reinforcing and inspiring established marriages (Parrott, 2005). Many couples have good marriages. But mentors can be of assistance with creating great marriages (Parrott, 2005). The mentor can start out by asking the couple the question of “What would make me a better spouse this week?” and have each one to write it down (Parrott, 2005). Proverbs 4:25-26 King James Version (KJV) says: “25. Let thine eyes look right on, and let thine eyes look straight before thee. 26. Ponder the path of thy feet, and let all thy ways be established.” In any marriage there is always going to be some bad decisions. The couple needs to have a purpose or marital mission for their marriage journey (Parrott, 200). The couple needs to comprehend and grasp that God is the only one that can sustain their necessities for their marriage and they just need to love each other with compassion and understanding (Parrott, 2005). Empathy will assist the couple with keep their eyes focused on the wonderful journey before them (Parrott, 2005). Repairing is the third aspect in the Mentoring triad and the utmost critical (Parrott, 2005). This is when married couples may be in a calamity and perhaps on the threshold of divorce (Parrott, 2005). Couples that have battled demons in their marriages and came out with stronger marriage make great marriage mentors for couple that are looking for repairing their marriage. If both partners desire to trek amongst the discomfort and antagonism of the shattering events they have done battle with, they can rescue their marriage (Parrott, 2005). With it being addiction, infidelity, or any type of loss in their marriage, they have to be willing to do whatever it takes to rebuild trust in the relationship (Parrott, 2005). One of the fundamentals of being a successful marriage mentor is becoming skilled at being yourself (Parrott, 2005). Which implies being true to you, not attempting “to be someone or something that you are not” (Parrott, 2005). Just be genuine and learn to be relaxed with yourself (Parrott, 2005). The marriage mentor always needs to learn to roll with the tide by letting the couple you are mentoring to regulate the tempo and route they want to go in (Parrott, 2005).
With being a pastor’s wife, this reading has brought to my mind a few issues that being a pastor’s wife, how people even church member look at us as a family. My husband Dean and I will have...
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