Abortion: The Responsible Decision
One of the most important time has come to a woman’s life is deciding whether to decorate the baby’s room with pink colors or blue. Other women may not have those thoughts in mind as they are to make a choice on whether to abort or keep her baby. Many decisions and choices we make on a daily basis may be influenced by our surroundings, society, and religion and beliefs. The decision or choices to terminate a pregnancy can be a difficult one and not well accepted by many people around the world, but aborting the child will be a smart and a responsible choice for a mother who is going to have a child with severe disabilities.
For many couples, making plans to have a child or children is a huge step that comes with many responsibilities. Having a baby can be a blessing to many but the idea of having a child with severe disabilities can bring many worries to new parents. The choice of keeping that fetus or not keeping it is a big decision to be made and definitely not an easy one for those parents who have just found out that their baby will be born with a severe disability. Abortion is one of the most common options available to the mothers once she has chosen not to continue with the pregnancy. This decision may be seen by many as a cruel and selfish choice but it will be crueler to bring a child into this world to not have a normal life like every other child out there. For most parents the positive sign in the pregnancy test is a very happy and unforgettable moment and the waiting for the arrival of that little person may not come soon enough. Many indescribable emotions come to mind as the first visit to the doctors where the couple will get to hear their baby’s heart beat for the first time and the most important test on the mother will begin to determine the health the fetus during the first trimester. The parents start making several plans for their unborn child, as to the choice of a name for a girl or a boy, the color for the baby’s room and even how much money to put aside each pay period for their college, but what happens when they are faced with a rude and cruel awakening that their unborn child will be born with a severe or several disabilities. Carpenter (2011) writes, “It was a choice no parents should ever have to make” (para. 2). The choice of terminating the pregnancy or let it continue its course. The choice of terminating the pregnancy at an early stage has always been a big debate topic. This has been seen as an act of cruelty and the killing of an unborn child. Regardless of the baby’s health and that of the mother, some mothers rather take a risk of dying during birth or have their babies die at birth or a much later time because of severe deformities or health issue. To many parents this is not a strong enough reason to terminate the pregnancy, because they feel that they will have the strength and love to take care for them and will help to provide the best and happiest life they deserve, but how true is that? These special babies will have bigger challenges than babies who are born without any severe health issues, and they are a lifetime commitment. Deardorff and Mellor wrote (2010): "It 's a full-time job and the pleasures or joys of childhood are just not there. It 's very common (to consider abandoning) in the early stages. But there comes a time you accept it" (para. 9). It is simple for some parents of these disabled children to say that their kids will be happy and that he or she will have all that he or she needs to live a comfortable life. The parents will not feel the pain the child is feeling when he or she are having seizures or when he or she are not feeling well and can’t seem to communicate how they are truly feeling because they are unable to speak or express their true feelings due to their disability. Not a simple thing to determine, but it is easy to assume that he or she are fine because he or she may be able to smile or show some sign of happiness? pw HHow about when he or she sees other kids play on the sand, run in the park, or go swimming in the ocean, how happy will he or she truly feel? Or when he or she can’t seem to understand why he or she can’t do what the other children are doing? Is it fair that he or she can’t even ask why they can’t do that? How can a child truly be happy when he or she is brought to this world without getting the fair opportunity to experience what every other kid is doing around them? Not being able to experience their first kiss, their prom night, walk down to received their high school diploma; Or something as simple as getting married and having a family of their own. If parents of kids with serious disability want to lie and say their baby will have a happy and fulfilling life, they can do so, but they are not being fair to their kids’ true needs of happiness. These babies will not only cause a high level of stress due to the demand of special attention from both parents but because they require a special care, like several medicines, treatments and especial devices to get around as they get older, it will also cause a financial weight on the family’s pocket. (Disabilites-Impact Of Disabilities On Families, 2012) Writes, “Overall, stress form these added demand of disability in family life can negatively affect the health and functioning of family members” (para. 7). In many instances, so much accumulates among the parents that it gets overwhelming and feel that the only way out is to separate before it gets uglier. The child will not have a real happy life as he or she deserves, the chances of being an abused child will be grater. Deardorff and Mellor wrote (2010): “Disabled children are abandoned at a much higher rate than healthy ones, and about two-thirds of those who are abandoned are boys, according to California psychologist Aaron Kipnis, a formerly abandoned child and homeless adolescent” (para. 15). Many parents start off saying how much love and time they will be giving to their child, but as time goes by the stress gets to them and they begin to search for other simple ways to take care of the disabled child and soon enough they will be forgotten. The idea of getting some type of assistance so that the family or the parents can go back to having a somewhat of a normal life, is a selfish act just like it was to have a child with severe disabilities that not even with all the attention and time that has been given will the parents ever feel as if they have a normal child with normal needs. Many times when the child is left at the mercy of the nurses or people who are supposed to be taking care of them, they are the very same ones who are abusive toward the child and the parents to do the high levels of stress that this is causing on them, they too would take their anger out on them. The parents will not worry so much about their needs, they will die of starvation and at times they will have been beaten so much that they will eventually die. The love for these children will not be enough to make the child seem normal or their lives. Many would like to argue that we have no right to decide the destiny of these unborn children, which by choosing to terminate the pregnancy we have just taken away that baby’s right to live. Now what about what kind of life style will this child have as it grows up? Their life style will be limited to what the parents are able to provide and they will never get to live a normal life, grow up have friends in school to play with, ride a motorcycle or be part of the swim team in school. How fair is it for a child to be raise under these circumstances? Religion can also influence the idea of not making the right choice by saying that the person who chooses that road will burn in hell. The churches are not there to help raise these children nor will they be part of their lives because the child may never be able to leave their house to even enjoy a day at church. The children are not the only ones suffering, so will the parents. The parents will have to drastically change their daily routines and give up their vacation time to be able to afford the medications needed to keep their child somewhat comfortable for the child will always depend on their parents for everything and for life. Not all the love and attention in the world will make them live a normal life as they deserve and no one will get to take care of them and love them as they deserve once their parents die. The decision of terminating a pregnancy at an early age do to do severe defects is smart and that of loving parents who much rather they suffer now than to see their child suffer for the rest of their life.
References Deardorff, J., & Mellor, M. K. (2010, January 10). Disabled Kids Push Parents ' Limits. Retrieved October 5, 2012, from Whale.to: http://www.whale.to/vaccines/disabled.html
Disabilites-Impact Of Disabilities On Families. (2012). Retrieved October 08, 2012, from JRank.org: http://family.jrank.org/pages/396/Disabilities-Impact-Disabilities-on-Families.html
Hawkins, K. (2012, May 16). Study: Planned Parenthood Targeting College Students with Abortion. Retrieved October 03, 2012, from Life News: www.lifenews.com
References: Deardorff, J., & Mellor, M. K. (2010, January 10). Disabled Kids Push Parents ' Limits. Retrieved October 5, 2012, from Whale.to: http://www.whale.to/vaccines/disabled.html Disabilites-Impact Of Disabilities On Families. (2012). Retrieved October 08, 2012, from JRank.org: http://family.jrank.org/pages/396/Disabilities-Impact-Disabilities-on-Families.html Hawkins, K. (2012, May 16). Study: Planned Parenthood Targeting College Students with Abortion. Retrieved October 03, 2012, from Life News: www.lifenews.com